Letters to the Editor
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I would be furious, but the advice is dead on
You have to let go of this, but it will take you a long, long, long time. Your husband loved you or he would have left you. His love was weak, imperfect, immature. That is the truth. He was a jerk, but maybe he was a jerk because he knew he was dying and he wanted to feel alive. Some people choose extreme sports when death comes close. Everyone seeks a distraction.
I do think you have to remember what you had with him that was positive, for the children as well as for yourself. Keep your mouth shut and protect them from the truth. They cannot remove your pain and making them hate their father will not make you happy. Never confirm anything. Eventually, you will be able to forgive him, and when you do, you will be happy you kept your distance from the gossip and condemnation.
Eventually, you may even be able to love again.