Letters to the Editor
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I have an ex-con neighbor too
I've lived with my wife in our home for over 17 years. It is beautiful where we live...three acres of land and a year-round creek running past the house.
There is an ex-con that moved onto the land next door 2 1/2 years ago and is building a home there. He has a wife and two kids. I tried being neighborly with him, as I do everyone. I waved when I saw him for six months. I bought him a bottle of champagne for a New Year's Eve present. All I've got in return from him for all the neighborly behavior on my part is snears.
This guy had gone to prison for aggravated robbery, which means he had a weapon and hurt someone in the commission of the robbery.
Long story short...he's now physically attacked me twice within an 18 month time span. The last time, he stalked me, ambushed me and hit me in the side of my head with a beer bottle.
Of course I called the police. They guanateed he'd attack me again, because he had done so twice already. They told me he is very aggressive and "this is his pattern." The side of my head wasn't gashed open, so the police couldn't arrest him for assault with a deadly weapon. They really wanted to, but they couldn't find the bottle, and I had a cigar-shaped goose egg on the side of my head from the bottle hitting me...so they didn't quite have enough evidence to take matters into their own hands.
It was up to me to have him arrested...I declined because I knew his wife would get him out on bail within 24 hours and then he'd probably kill me. I'm not being dramatic. I really believe my life, and perhaps my wife's, would have been in peril. I got a restraining order.
There are basically two types of ex-cons...those who went to jail for non-violent stuff...like doing drugs...and others that went away for doing violent stuff. Even if they've "paid society's debt," they are still violent and live life by their own rules.
If your neighbor has verbally threatened to physically harm you and gotten within an inch of your face...DO NOT EVER TALK TO HIM AGAIN. You've gotten all the warning you're likely to get. He is primal and doesn't really think things through...he react...with rage and physical violence. DON'T TALK TO HIM AGAIN!
These types of guys spin stories in their heads. The more you try to be "normal" with them...the more they are building a story in their heads that justifies for them why they can physically attack you. Believe me. Even though you are rightly trying to get your money back, the more you attempt to do so, the more he will tell himself you're getting in his face and HE WILL ATTACK YOU.
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Advice from poets
Neither a borrower nor a lender be
and
Good fences make good neighbors
When the poets got ya beat for advice, well then, maybe it's time to take a vacation.
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"Neither a borrower nor a lender be"
Of course, the guy who said that was meant to be seen as a bit of a buffoon...his platitudes were good for all occasions, but he never said anything of substance. Might be that a real-life situation is more complicated than Polonius' narrow view of the world.
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a little lesson from the universe
I’m amazed. You want to be a successful business man? Some lessons in business savvy are needed here. How can you allow an ex-con who still hadn’t paid his bills to use you for cheap/free emergency rescue? Didn’t you see the signs? You could’ve just said, “Sorry I’m busy, can’t make it at the moment, but I’ll call give you the number of a good garage.”
But it’s too late for that now. Sadly, some folk are real bastards, and this one seems unlikely to develop a conscience in this lifetime. I’d just stay the hell away from him, and ramp up the security on the house, keep your animals indoors when you’re not around to supervise them. Try to get some support from your other neighbours. And do contact the police, this guy and his kid are dangerous.
In the meantime, looks like you need the regular income as a paid mechanic in a garage, at least part-time. Then perhaps think about getting a business partner who’s a bit more street smart than you. You have a good and innocent heart that’s too open to abuse by the likes of con-man.
By the way, I think you’ve lost the money. Just chalk it down to experience.
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oh man
you totally need to get the law on your side if this guy is threatening violence to you and your neighbor's pet (two that you named specifically, and seems there must be more.)
like the one guy said, if he's an ex-con he may well be on parole...but hey, take advantage of your natural advantage here- it's likely people will believe you and your neighbors (presumably you guys could band together to get this guy out of your lives at best but under control at least) over an ex-con.
right? right?? go for it!! get this guy outta there!!
and get your money, too! the same guy had a good point- your financial records and the towtruck and etc...all stellar evidence.
rah rah rah! i'm rooting for you!
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Ignore the tough guy advice.
I've read through these letters with interest. Some writers advise you to stand up physically to your nut of a neighbor. Those writers know how to fight and have fought people before. If you were like them, I'd say go for it.
If you're not, if you're the average, basically non-violent person, their advice will get you killed. Your nut of a neighbor is most likely an experienced violent fighter. He won't crumble mentally under the stress of a fight. His killer instinct is there. His skills are there, honed and tested. This is no place for you to learn how to fight, because this guy won't back off if you call a time out -- he'll just kick you when you're down, literally.
I think it's fine advice for you to take a martial arts class. Maybe in 5 years, you might be ready to fight this guy.
Until then, if I were you I'd form a good relationship with the police. I'd stay away from this guy whenever possible. Most importantly, if I were you I would be armed. Weapons even the field. You're in luck, being a mechanic. You have every legitimate reason to have a wrench or other heavy tool on you. They are legal implements (unlike, say, a concealed knife), and you can wield them against your nut of a neighbor with devastating force.
I hope this all works out peacefully for you. I hope the cops take care of this guy and his sadistic, monstrous son, but until then, you need to act like this guy is a rabid dog. Be wary, and carry a weapon.
Good luck. Mean and violent people are the scourge of this Earth.
P.S. If you encounter this guy, stay more than an arm's length away from him. He can't hit you if he can't reach you. If he gets closer, move away and tell him to stay away. If he doesn't, get ready for the worst.