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Saturday, Jul 4, 2009
Letter Writer: You are an excellent mother. You are brave, strong, and compassionate. You want what is best for your children and you sacrifice to give them the best life they can have. There should be more parents like you in this world.
I believe that by choosing to not make a big deal out of nudity you are making a healthy choice for your children, and for our culture. As others have noted, the United States has huge cultural taboos against nudity. We could discuss the roots and sexual outgrowths of these taboos for days, but what it boils down to is that we come from "a land of prudes."
You should be clear on what you are doing though. To you nudity is no big deal. I applaud that, but you should remain very aware of how that perception may be interpreted by the norm-enforcers of our society. Just looking at the letters posted here gives a good idea of how annoyed people can be at your choice to flaunt the norm, and these are more liberal than people you might encounter elsewhere.
The enforcers of social norms can be brutal. They can be vicious. They do not care about you or your children, but only that you adhere to the norm. They believe that any deviation from these norms is inherently harmful.
I say this because you are choosing to change a social norm. You are giving your children the power to choose whether or not they agree with that norm, and the power to determine for themselves if they want to follow that norm. I commend you for this, and encourage you to continue.
But recognize that you may encounter challenges along the way. You may eventually be confronted by other parents, by members of the community, or your church, or your children's school. They may come to you and try to enforce the nudity-taboo. They may threaten you. They may ostracize you and your children.
I don't say any of this to put fear in your heart, but to draw your awareness to the choice you are making. I believe it is the right choice, and I believe that making that choice is the key to creating change.
I'm a proponent of personal activism, of direct action. I believe the best way to change our culture is to actively and directly break the norm and reshape it in the image we desire. For me, this means kissing my male friends in public as well as in private. It means being open about my religion and spirituality. It means turning down plastic bags when I don't need them, and it means not shopping at a store if I don't like their politics. For me it means living collectively, pooling the resources of my friends and family to create beautiful, full lives for each of us. For me it means not being ashamed of my bodily functions, and peeing with the door open.
For you, it sounds like it means being a good mother without allowing other peoples issues to influence you. For you, it sounds like it means teaching your children that the human body is beautiful. For you, it sounds like it means teaching them to respect themselves and others, and teaching them to be strong and make their own choices.
It is by doing what we believe is right, regardless of what the norm-enforcers say, that we create the world we want to live in. I encourage you, and I wish you the best.
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