....you are already in this school. Be quiet about your beliefes until you get your degree. Without a degree, your options in life are severely limited. Eventually you can discuss your beliefs, but until it is safe to do so, STFU.

Cary's verbal worm's nest will make a nice oratorio someday, but let's cut to the quick: social pretense is a bad thing, an energy sink, and it sends echoes of distortion throughout an entire life. You'll quickly find like-minded friends and even your parents will get over it.

There's an odd resonance of this crisis in the grammatical query about the sentence: "You simply turn out to be whomever you really are." The linguistic fact is that 'whomever' has long since departed from the actual language. Attempts to use it frequently founder on guessing and false analogy -- 'hypercorrection' in the jargon of the trade. I'm sure it has behavioral analogies where action contradicts belief.

Be the atheist you are; write the English you speak.

As I see it, colleges that demand a signing statement declaring a certain belief and then consider that a contract are practicing mind control, as in Big Brother Is Watching You. Their piece of paper is worthless, and they do not deserve the respect you give them by actually believing you need to inform them of what you actually think.

They get what they deserve with a requirement like that; either lily liver robotic morons who actually think it is important to promise to think a particular way, or someone who lies to them. I wouldn't worry about it at all. It is no one's business what you THINK.

Relax. You are allowed to think what you want on this, and it is no one's business. Go ahead a graduate. If you must discuss this with your parents, wait until then, though, if only to make your life manageable. However I don't think you should tell them, since they actually think they have the right to throw a fit if they find out you don't believe as they do. On the more empathetic side, I see also that this would only hurt them in any case, and why hurt your parents?

This sort of problem seems uniquely American to me. We have to announce our opinions to everyone so that they know where we stand whether the topic is religion, sexual orientation, or choice of soft drink. The truth of the matter is that you don't have to tell everyone everything about you nor do you have to offer your opinion on topics which create conflict and tension. You have the freedom to keep some information private or to reveal it only in situations where it is appropriate to the audience in front of you.

Allowing a topic (such as religion) to simply fade out of a conversation by not starting an argument about it isn't hiding who you are. It's making a choice not to create a conflict pointlessly. This doesn't make you weak or meek. It makes you shrewd about how you deal with people and shows that you have the strength to keep your opinions to yourself at the appropriate times. This is a practice which will, incidentally, serve you well in the business world in the future.

In the U.S., there are many people who feel they have to loudly agree and disagree with the people they spend time with any time there are conflicting views but this is absolutely pointless when you know the person you are dealing with isn't going to change his or her mind about the topic at hand no matter what you say. Sometimes, discretion is the better part of valor and you should set aside your need to "win" arguments or "show people what you think". You can let the "God bless you" and "God will protect you" comments go by with a smile knowing the intent of the person making these comments is a good one even if you don't believe in God. Failing to proclaim your disbelief doesn't mean you endorse their faith but rather that you accept their feelings.

I think the writer should carefully consider who needs to know he (or she) is an atheist and why each party needs to know. Spiritual beliefs are a private matter, not something you need to trumpet no matter what your beliefs are.

Well, obviously you, the LW, do care about what you believe. But, as another poster pointed out, nobody else wants to hear about it.

Nobody wants to argue about their beliefs or lack of them with you. Unless of course they are duty-bound by their evangelical stance to try to "turn you to the path of righteousness". And I am guessing that you don't really want to spend the next few years having that particular unending conversation! So, don't mention it to them.

You talk about revealing your athiesm as "coming out" (!) but that isn't a very apt analogy. Yeah, everyone in college is very Emotional About Everything, and What I Believe somehow becomes almost as important for college students to express as is their sexual orientation. But in real life, most people couldn't care less about whether you believe in God or not (while sexual orientation is still an issue for many).

In contrast, what people will notice about you and care about is whether you are honest in your business dealings and romantic partnerships, if you take responsibility to take care of your children, if you are mean and cruel to others, if you beat up or cheat on your partner, if you brag and gossip and make trouble vs. if you are a trustworthy friend.

Basically, what's important is how you act, not what you say you believe.

Of course you must know this already. I went to a Christian college myself. So, we both know that many of the most vocally religeous students, the ones who are always leading prayer groups and who are up front singing ecstatically during the worship services, can be found in the dorm stairwells having sex and stoned out of their minds come Saturday night.

So....why not start acting in the way you think is consistent with your beliefs? Don't freak out and demean your friends and family by telling them just how stupid you think their beliefs are. What possible good could come of it? If you feel like you "have" to tell everyone, ask yourself why you feel that? Do you feel insecure in your beliefs and like they will vanish if they aren't a constant topic of conversation?

Why not just live your life and let them live theirs? Unless someone directly asks you and seems genuinely interested in having a discussion about it, just keep it to yourself.

So..finish up your degree, resolve to not make the easy lie in the future for personal gain, and start living in the real world. Which I can guarantee you, is far, far more contradictory and ambivalent and perplexing than your current college world.