Letters to the Editor
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genius
Cary, that was fucking brilliant! "What fresh hell"? "Two ragged beggars, hiding behind the Safeway"? From one writer to another: bravo!
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Bravohwaitaminute...
Cary, that was fucking brilliant! "What fresh hell"? "Two ragged beggars, hiding behind the Safeway"? From one writer to another: bravo!
You should send that writerly "bravo" to Dorothy Parker, since it was she who first used the phrase "fresh hell", as in "What fresh hell is this?"
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Thank You
Thank you for reminding me to be an artist.
Thank you for reminding me not to fear those voices that make themselves at home inside our heads.
Thank you for giving me the courage to face another week pregnant with impossibilities.
Thank you for reminding me that love lacks reason, most especially self-love.
And now, I too, must get back to work.
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count yer blessings
Being famous stinks. It ruins things in your life when it comes blowing through. I think this is especially true if you're famous for something creative.
Maybe some creative people can handle it well... but I can't think of any!
It happened to me for 15 minutes once (for the band I was in), and it was ultimately a miserable experience that made it so much harder to ever make music again. The awareness of the existence of an unquenchable mob -- the awareness that this is the highest point you'll reach -- these things tend to shine bright lights into the nice, shady, creative corners of your brain. Self-awareness in such a big mirror warps you, I think.
Anyway, maybe your sister is perfect? or maybe she puts up a great front while the pressures and anxieties of fame eat away at her soul?
But from the sound of your fragile ego I tend to think you dodged a bullet.
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I'm an artist, too. . .
So it's not like I don't know where you're coming from. But I can tell you this - there's always someone better out there. As good as you think your sister is, there are people a million times more talented than she is out in the world. There are people more talented than you. No matter HOW good someone is, there is ALWAYS someone better. You aren't freaking out/obsessing over Michelangelo, are you? Or Picasso? Or Frida Kahlo? Don't freak out over your sister, either.
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I've been there
... and the best advice I can give you is to stop being a designer and start being an artist. When you sell your work, you edit out what might be thrilling, exciting, shocking and bold. You work safe. You need to go down the scary path of art for your own sake first before you can make any decisions about who you are creatively. Possibly you have been down that path before, but you need to recharge, re-learn, re-find yourself.
Although I don't have a sister to compare myself to in my business, I have always felt I was a mediocre designer (graphics). I tried to get out of the business, but couldn't because the money was too good. It wasn't until I went through a face-off with my own mortality - both my parents died early, in the same year, from cancer - that I realized I might only have a few years left to accomplish what I dreamed of - to be a successful artist.
When I quit the business, I had the luck to have a husband who was willing to support me for awhile. (You obviously have that asset as well.) I started taking classes. I started doing work that I had no intention of selling. I did work that I liked, my only criteria.
My story has a very happy ending - I found a medium that sings in my hands, though I may never get rich doing it. I do have acclaim, (someone called me a goddess tonight, in fact, admiring my work!) a busy teaching and show schedule, and a decent income. And peace of mind.
What more do you need in life?
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no short supply of inspiration
When Cary is passionate about the query he really lets it rip! Just when I was feeling rather blase about my latest painting/story/photo/dance/design/production. You scared the you know what out of me too with all that truth. Like this: it is not her business to judge, just to maintain. Or this: murderous voices. Oh, they bother other people too?
That was invigorating and could be applied to many paths. If you didn't feel something from that, your ability to be moved has left you absolutely cold. That was quite a ride, whooosh!
Now, yes, get back to work LW. I will be doing the same thing. Let it RIP!
P.S. Being famous would suck on many levels.
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As a designer and creative all around person
I am acutely aware of all the issues regarding fame and desire.
I wanted to be a world famous architect. I may still become famous one day for a creative achievement, and I have had a few small 'wins', book citations, awards, articles for various projects of mine in several disparate fields.
Point is, it is not the recognition, but how well you feel you did inside. I am a perfectionist designer, I feel like my projects are never good enough. But year after year I become closer to my goal, it is about the reconciliation of your talent and drive with the reality that nothing could ever be a perfect design or creation.
This is made worse by the fact that your sister is right there, seemingly being superior. So much of design and creativity is in the marketing. Frank Gehry is a good architect, but he is an EXCELLENT marketer. His designs often seem clunky and botched together and slapped onto a box. Where he excelled was at creating the image that he was doing something groundbreaking. Frankly, there are at least two other designers in the LA area alone who I think are superior to him but who have achieved far less fame or success.
True, there are some true talents in my profession, like Steven Holl and Zaha Hadid. People who have developed a new design vocabulary altogether.
So--
- Focus on the dialog in your head between your ambition, abilities and the design. That is what you got into the business for, for the challenge of the design, isn't it?
- Realize that your sister's situation is as much luck as anything.
- Create your own personality and manifest it in some way, as a new viewpoint or direction for your designs. Make something that sticks in people's minds, give it a hook.
You are in a good spot, because I am sure if you create something interesting and different, your sister can probably help you shop around the concept or design. Not all of us have this connection.
You have to be happy with yourself despite this, ultimately. Life is too short for one to be eaten out with jealousy. I used to be such a jealous person. Then I learned to just breathe and accept where I am in my life. My life gets better and better. But it is gradual.
I empathize with Livingston Taylor and Jim Belushi and all the others who grew up wanting to do as well as their siblings in their chosen business.