This has nothing to do with cocaine. When someone promises you a raise IN THE FUTURE, that raise isn't coming. I mean, okay, if you just started a job and they are promising to revue your performance in six months and then give you a raise, that's kosher. But if you are clearly a valued employee and they don't want you to leave, they'll find the money to keep you and give it to you now. What this woman did to you was brilliant. She got you to stay on the job by promising you a raise in the future. She didn't have to pony up anything. She got to keep you for another six months for no money down. I admire this woman. She knows how to run a free arts magazine. And look! She's doing it again. She takes you out to lunch and says the raise isn't coming...but it will come over the next six months. See what she just did? Again? Have you learned your lesson yet?

The problem with the "cocaine" aside is that it's not the point. It's so much easier to judge this woman (and feel superior to her) than it is to decide what you're worth and go for it. This woman might be on drugs, but she totally played you. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

I would have zero regret turning in a druggie because by and large the druggie would turn you in if it suited them.

...you must move on. Get moving and don't look back. Godspeed.

Get the heck out of there! Yes, change is scary - I'm with you there. But working for a boss like that is soul-sucking and just not worth it. Maybe you can still take that job at the other newspaper - it's worth asking. If not, maybe you can temp while you look for something else.

If you do quit, I'm sure your boss will throw another fit, full of empty promises, accusations, whining and whatever else. Brace yourself and have a response ready ("I've decided it's time for me to move on." "I've found another opportunity I want to pursue."). When she tries to get you to change your mind, repeat your prepared phrase like a broken record, but don't engage with her, and don't negotiate.

I agree with Cuff Links that the cocaine isn't really the source of the problem, but the fact that she can find the money to finance that but not to keep her promises to give you a raise is telling, isn't it? You owe it to yourself to find a position where you'll be paid what you're worth and where you'll be treated fairly. Go for it.

Spend the next few weeks finding another job. Pick a "drop-dead" date, at which point you will either quit the job or resign yourself to being a worthless human being.

Once you have found a job, go to this person. Tell them you are quitting at close of business that day unless they put in your hand by that time either cash or a cashiers check for the 30% raise, backdated to the day they promised it to you. NOT the day it was supposed to kick in, the day they PROMISED it to you. You deserve the extra 30% * 6 months, and they deserve the penalty for jerking you around.

If they don't pony up, leave and never go back there. If they do, you will then know exactly what tactics are necessary to deal with them and will be forearmed and considerably better off monetarily.

There is literally no possible downside to this course of action.

Best observation or advice I ever got in my life: "When do you know a drug user is lying? Their lips are moving."

Scum's advice will work until the next battle royale. Or she might give the LW a check and it will bounce. It will be an endless cycle.

The LW owes the boss absolutely nothing - no notice, no loyalty, no thanks. The boss manipulated the LW and lied and got away with it, as another poster pointed out. She has no reason to change. So unless the LW wants to play hardball almost every working day, leaving is the only recourse.

Work in a fast food restaurant if you have to until something better comes along LW, but leave and don't look back. Change is scary, but it often leads to better things if you have the right frame of mind.

I know exactly where you are at, and there is more at work here than just fear of change. We are living at a time where the fine arts are so undervalued as a part of our society, that we feel nearly apologetic about participating in them - whether it be as artist or critic. As a result, we all basically "take what we can get" - which means, we willingly let ourselves get screwed over in order to have a life in the arts. But really, this has in turn created an army of users, happy to take advantage of our earnest intentions. In turn, we feel shitty about ourselves, and eventually we feel shitty about art, and bitter about our own potential. It doesn't have to be this way - take Cary's advice. Quit the job, and think big - think so big it embarasses you! Sit at a cafe until you figure out what it is that you would ask for if you could have ANYTHING and then announce your intention to go after it. I promise you will reap copious rewards for being so audacious.

Cary hit it out of the park on this, and I agree with everything written in so far (will miracles ever cease?) so I only have one thing to add.

Given your boss's behavior so far, I think you need to give careful thought to your personal exit strategy. As in, how you tell her, when you tell her (notice), and how her behavior will likely escalate to meet this new challenge of yours.

As a previous writer noted, she's played you for six month increments not once, but twice, and managed it by applying a good amount of drama, some well-directed guilt inducers, and throwing on exactly what you wanted to hear. So don't be surprised if she goes through those motions again, and then escalates a level or two when she figures out that yes, you really ARE leaving. Don't be surprised if, when blandishments don't work, threats or false accusations follow.

May I offer a suggestion? Give her as little notice as you personally can live with (none is perfectly acceptable, btw) and begin removing your personal items from the workplace now, slowly, one at a time. If asked, you're redoing your home workspace and wanted to see how that picture or that little plant would look there, but get anything of yours that you care about *out* now, long before you give notice. I have a feeling that the day you tell her you're quitting will be your last day there... certainly the last day you get any real work done.

Even if you leave with no "writing" job, or no job at all (you can always go be a temp for a while), leaving is your only option. She will never behave with the integrity she demands of you, and you will never not be agonized by her dishonesties, betrayals, and amazing selfishness. Go. As soon as you can. Other jobs will open up, but this is not worth sticking around for, paycheck, raise, or none.

Best wishes --