Letters to the Editor
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@mcquaidla
Cut the drama bro... I believe that to be an absurd suggestion. Anyone who would think up a solution like that wouldn't have half the sense to write Cary in the first place and is obviously looking for objectivity rather than your it's-my-ball-and-I'm-going-home answer. Pick your battles.
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drive them out.
eat their food, mess up there living space, play loud music when they sleep, and make a mess of the apartment - lots of stuff on the floor that the baby will most certainly have to be protected from. start smoking cigars - or at leasst lighting them up. ask them for money, borrow money from them at any opportunity you get and never pay them pack.
while you are doing this, smile at them get clowe and compliment them, praise them as good friends.
make passes at the wife. make passes at the guy watch rauchy porno in the living room while they are there. start a collection of slasher movies and put them in the dvd player, turn up the volume and walk away. become a fan of death metal. tell them you want sex. stand and stare at them without saying anything.
get a prescription for some happy pills from your doctor and be sure to show them the bottle of pills. in a couple of days, freak out and accuse them of stealing your pills. bug out your eyes and froth a bit and just keep demanding that they give you your pills.
enthusiastically invite them to go and do things with you, ALL THE TIME.
kepp asking them for money. eat their food, make a mess, etc - they will be out within two months.
attend the birthing classes with them and announce that you intend to deliver the baby. by a video camera and tape in your apartment and tell them you want to put them on youtube and or make porno.
i've been nice to moochers too. it doesn't pay.
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Legal insanity
LW, thanks for your letter, its been fascinating to read the letters accumulate a consensus of such venom, hatred, and anger towards the parents to be.
Which seems very strange if you actually go back and read the letter. The "mooching" male roommate moved in 3 years ago to help LW with the rent. This is acceptable behavior. He then asks his roommate if his pregnant girlfriend can move in. Acceptable behavior again, if not well thought out. They seem to be friends, LW helps his sick roommates - nothing wrong with that.
The issue is that the triumvirate never sat down to think about the implications of the newborn in the space, and now they are, too late.
What I fail to see is how, if all you nasty ass commenters are willing to have the parents attacked legally and thrown on the street (even though there is no evidence they are doing anything legally wrong - just asking the 3rd roommate to leave) how you can not implicate the LW beyond calling him a doormat.
I also think the LW sounds like a nice person, and its very clear from reading the letter s/he's hurt about it and having to leave is also tied up in his/her's friendship.
My advice would be: accept that living with a newborn will be horrendous (it is), explain to your friends that this hurts a lot, ask them to do something to help (like give you some cash, help you find a new place, help you pack) and stay friends down the road. If they are the evil insane moochers that your commenters would have them be, you'll be better off away from them. If not, you can stay friends, actually like the child from a distance (cause you'll hate it if you live there), and remember to discuss these kind of issues before they happen in the first place.
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People are crazy
... and you should tell them so.
Realize that she's probably got hormonal whiplash, and he's got the stress that living with a monumentally prego hormonally whiplashed woman in tight quarters will get you.
So in your heart you should know they're confused and scared and beating you up so that they can feel better. They're not doing this because it's reasonable; they're hitting you so they can feel powerful at a time when they feel vulnerable.
If I were you, I'd tell them that you're not sure you can forgive them, even though you know they're insane over anxieties about the baby. I'd tell them that obviously they should have planned this earlier and found their own place like responsible adults, rather than act like entitled spoiled children who should get whatever they want because they want it. And then, get out of dodge while the getting is good!
You know, it's very helpful to have an additional person in the house with a newborn. So, unless they intend to fill your room with a grandparent or a nanny, they're really monumentally dumb to do this, on top of being inexcusably self-involved.
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GET A LAWYER. NOW
LW. I'm not a lawyer...but I'm going to give you completely free and by the way completely useless, possibly dangerous legal advice.
Actually. I am a lawyer. But I don't know what jurisidiction you live in, and chances are I don't practice there.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE do not take legal advice from strangers...it's much more dangerous than taking candy from a stranger.
I cannot tell you your legal rights in this situation, and wouldn't even if I knew more about the situation. There are too many variables that come into play and you need a real sit down appointment with a real lawyer who is experienced in this field of law in your jurisdiction. And this is why you need to ignore the crap that's being thrown at you here, including Cary's crap.
There are three elements to reviewing the legal situation here.
1. The lease, if such exists.
2. The state law governing landlord tenant, including not just the statutes, but also the case law interpreting the statutes and local ordinances.
3. How the court system dispatches eviction cases in your area. In some jurisdictions it's a piece of cake to get rid of a tenant. In others...it is a long agonizing process. You need someone who can tell you what your rights are, and should you elect to stand your ground, how difficult and costly it would be to go through a court proceeding if that's the way you want to play it.
4. Now, the lawyer has to take all of that and mix in who you are dealing with here and how they could try to sabotage you and what counterclaims they might try to launch against you that could prolong the process.
So. You're not going to be able to get that kind of advice from this forum.
The bottom line is, no matter whether you decide to stay or go...you need to see a lawyer.
That's got to be the first layer of consideration. From there, you can make a pragmatic decision for yourself. You don't have to always stand your ground, but make sure that you are protected if you leave.
And bloody don't change the locks. That's the absolute worst advice. Jeez. That could open you up for triple damages if you were considered a landlord in my jurisdiction.
As for the ethics: You're right. They are wrong. They know it. You know it. The baby has nothing to do with it. Forget the baby. It's really pretty clear cut. You have no responsibility to these people or their progeny at this point. They have shown that they are not friends and not very nice people. I think you need to settle this matter on the basis of what serves your own best interests the best.