Letters to the Editor
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There's a false choice set up here
Cary writes as if the choices in this matter are either a) LW goes or b) LW throws out roomies. This is not, in fact the case. The third choice here is c) LW refuses to leave. And if I were him/her, that's exactly what I'd do. However shaky the legal ground is for LW to evict the roomies, it's at least as shaky for the roomies to evict the LW. Just refuse to leave. Hopefully the dirtbags would take the hint and find their own damn place.
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Right, why not just stay?
I was going to say the same thing. The most straightforward thing at the present time appears to be to sit tight. You unquestionably have a rental agreement in force with the primary landlord. Even if Roommate is also on the primary rental agreement, he has no basis on which to force you out. You have already said you are cool with the current arrangement. Since Roommate is not happy with it, then he, not you, is the one who needs to go find a replacement situation.
From your perspective, you would be happy living with the couple and the new baby. (That indicates that you have no idea what you are in for with a new infant, but that's a whole other angle...) You have no reason to change your position, and no reason to start behaving any differently than you have already. (Okay, maybe stop being a complete doormat. But you don't have to get deliberately obnoxious, either.) Who knows, the parents may discover that having a helper around the house is a pretty nice perk.
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Really only two things you can do here
1. Get a lawyer. Since none of us knows the specifics here, it would be foolish for us to tell you what to do. But it would be even more foolish for you to take any action without considering the impact on your legal rights and/or obligations (current and future.)
2. Take a good long look in the mirror. You see that chump your looking at? Well, tell him to get the hell out of your life and start standing up for yourself.
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Whatever you do, do NOT change the locks!
There are a lot of armchair lawyers out there advising the LW to just throw the roommates' stuff out the door and change the locks, walk away and cut off the utilities, etc.
Almost every jurisdiction has laws that prevent landlords from doing that very thing (otherwise, the LW could come home to find himself the victim of the very same strategy). The penalties for this kind of "self-help" are very, very stiff and the LW should definitely NOT engage in any such behavior.
In addition, who is or isn't on the lease may be irrelevant. In most jurisdictions, if you live in a place - even if you DON'T pay rent - and can prove that you live there, it will take a court order to get them out. One utility bill (including cell phone), let alone a cancelled rent check, is enough to establish the presumption of legal tenancy. It is often harder to get people out when there is no lease, which is why letting anyone stay at your place can be a huge mistake unless you are absolutely sure they are going to leave.
In the end, the LW is going to have to decide what s/he wants. If the apartment is a great deal or has value to the LW, s/he may want to stick it out. In that instance, good legal advice will most certainly be necessary, and it would also be helpful for the LW to surround him/herself with friends with stronger constitutions that will help him/her stay strong when the going gets tough.
I had an ex who went through exactly the same thing. He had a huge, rent-controlled apartment and a roommate. The roommate got a girlfriend, who basically stayed there all the time until she was basically living there rent and expense-free. The ex, also a doormat type, wrung his hands but was basically ineffective as he was always worried about being "nice". They had his number, and eventually decided that they'd rather live there without him and asked him to leave. Being law students, they knew they had certain legal rights regardless of the agreement with my ex. They would have rolled right over him and pushed him out had I not gotten involved. After several confrontations, I bascially told them that if they did not stop trying to use their knowledge as law students to bulldoze my ex out of his apartment, I would be very happy to inform their law school dean, their prospective employer and the bar association of their unscrupulous tactics - not the best way to launch a legal career. They moved out pretty quickly after that. If the LW can get any sort of leverage, I highly advise using it if s/he wants to stay.
I wish the LW good luck - and Cary, can we please get an update???
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Stick to your guns
Living with a newborn baby isn't going to be any fun for you - they are loud! Play on the mom's nesting intincts and help her realize that there is no way to babyproof the current place, no room for a crib or playpen or whatever baby stuff they want. Help them move out if you want, but have them move out.
If you give in on this, you'll feel poorly about it for years. Pregnant women and new moms are not helpless. (I know - I've been one.) Help look for a place, help pack boxes, but stand your ground. You'll appreciate it at the 2am feeding, the 3am feeding, the 4am feeding....
And once they've left, buy them a nice baby gift and have that be the closure to that relationship. They are blackholes of need and they feed off of the spineless.
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You could move.
I mean, it would suck, but you could do it.
Like this: Find out how much time is left on the lease you have. Say you will not move out until the lease is up.
When the lease is up arrange with your building manage to take ANOTHER unit in the building. Same cost, same whatevers, roll over your deposit from the old place into the new place, and arrange for a new roomate if you need one to split the rent.
Move your stuff upstairs, downstairs, down the hall. Whatever. It'll be cheaper than hiring movers, or getting a U-Haul or whatever.
CLOSE the lease on the old place. Tell the new roomates if they want to stay there they'll have to pay a deposit of their own and have their own lease with the building manager.
After all...it's only the right thing to do. They can stay. But they have to have their own lease. Their own deposit. Their own rental agreement, including any deposits or stipulations involved in having a baby in an apartment.
IF you move out without closing out your old lease AND if they are on the lease with you then you MUST have them sign a "Roomate Release Form" and it must include a clause that the are required to pay YOU back your deposit IN FULL upon signature.
Because if you go you'll never see that deposit again. Deposits are returned to the remaining tenants, not the tenants who paid it in the first place.
Also add a clause that they owe you one months' rent as moving expenses.
And that's the only way you'll sign the roomate release agreement...once the cash is in hand. Then you get 30 days to move from that date of signature. Or 14 days. Whatever you want, really.
Before that you are still on the hook for rent so you cannot legally move out and entrust them to pay rent on time. You are liable until the roomate release form is filed with the building manager, so you will simply not be moving out until they meet your terms.
It is not your problem that they are ill-prepared for this child and did not make proper arrangements for their new family. If they knew they wanted to live independantly with their child they should've brought it up to you much sooner, and looked into preparing to move LONG before this point in time.
But they can't kick you out. They simply can't. You can't really kick them out either. You're at an impasse, but if they really WANT to be on their own they'll find a way to move out, or buy you out.
Also if they move out remind them you need 30 days notice. Otherwise they're on the hook for the rent...especially if they're on the lease. Without 30 days notice even if they get it together enough to move they have to pay the next month's rent, and hell, all the next month's rents until you decide you've found a suitable new roomate and you've all signed roomate release forms releasing THEM from their lease obligation.
Roomate release forms exist for a reason. They exist so that you cannot say "You don't live here" without the other person signing a document consenting to that fact, and having a paper trail absolving them from the lease responsibility.