Letters to the Editor
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You let your friends evict you ..
You got a terrific answer. Covered pretty much all the bases. Only thing I'd add, is that I'd winced when I read that you'd taken the couch. That was pretty much a "I'm just temporary here" move. Yup-yup. So give yourself high marks for being a great room-mate (such perfection is hard to find .. I know; I'm an apt manager who sees it fail more often than not). And take this lesson into the rest of life, as well. Typically, people who play doormats and pander to others' every need as roommates, follow that same modus operandi in many parts of their lives. It's a tough lesson. Turn it to work for you.
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and another thing....
As Cary notes, you got yourself into this. LW.... But then so did the other people. So if they end up having to find another place on short notice with a baby on the way, well, um, the "you got yourself into this" schtick works both ways....
A couple of years ago, a neighbor dog decided it liked to hang around our house more than its own. We already have dogs. We didn't want another. Our state has leash laws, and dogs aren't legally supposed to be allowed by their owners to wander. We phoned the name on the dog tag and the owner was surprised. "We always let our dog wander," they responded. And although the dog was sweet and I liked it, it was also disruptive. We kept phoning, and the owners would pick the dog up after many hours. After weeks of that, I finally got fed up and phoned the pound, noting if the owners refused to collect it, I'd take the dog myself. A friend said, "Sometimes, C, you don't choose the dog, the dog chooses you." I thought about that for awhile, feeling guilty. And then I thought, I'm a good and responsible pet owner, I take good care of my dogs, I don't let them wander. I don't let them make a nuisance of themselves with neighbors. Maybe this time, I thought, it's not about me. Maybe this time it's about other people taking responsibility for themselves and what's theirs. That was a valuable lesson for me.
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Maybe you should move out, but not on their timeline
The other respondents are right when they say you should consult a lawyer in your area--I have a feeling that they cannot force you out of this apartment. But if you don't have a legal leg to stand on for requiring them to relocated, they can--and likely will--make your life a living hell once you refuse their request. In which case moving out may be the best choice.
But you shouldn't feel in any way obligated to honor their timeline. They decided that they want you out before the baby arrives. And they've known the baby was coming for how many months? You should take all the time you need to locate a comparable living arrangement--moving out is, after all, a favor, the last one you will grant to these former friends.
Grin and bear it through the difficult transition time, and get out of there if you must. Just be sure their selfishness doesn't thrust you into a worse living situation, and be sure that after you move out they are solely responsible for paying rent and repairing possible damage to the apartment. Put it in writing. Get your security deposit back. Move on.
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Good God people, kick them out.
What awful advice Carrie. LW, your "friends'" living arrangement is not your responsibility, your living arrangement is however and it sounds like you have a nice apartment already. It is obviously apparent that they don't care about you and are not appreciative of what you have done in the past.
To the people who advise that LW move out but tell them how he feels - are you stupid?
It's clear that these "friends" don't care how he feels. Haven't you figured that out yet? Is crying to them going to pull on their heart strings and make them change their minds? No. If LW follows your advice he will have been screwed out of home and money and these people will not even think twice about him or his predicament again. "What goes around, comes around", c'mon, what type of crap is that. That is what the weak tell themselves to feel better. How is that different from the Catholic Church telling destitute 3rd world people to accept their lot in life because God will reward them in the afterlife. What complacency, what a joke.
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The baby will be fine!
I think the baby is actually the least likely to be affected by this drama. An infant doesn't know where it lives and is fine anywhere that Mom and/or Dad is. And LW isn't kicking them out on the street - presumably they have money to pay rent since they want LW's apartment to themselves. There is always an apartment for rent *somewhere*. And they can move again a few months down the road when they find something better. The baby will remember none of it.
Also, the baby will be better off somewhere without all the tension.
And its nonsense that a pregnant woman and/or new mom can't move to a new home. My husband and I started looking for a new place when we found out I was pregnant with our first child, but didn't find something we loved until I was 9 months pregant. We moved when our daughter was 3 weeks old. I helped pack, haul, unpack, assemble furniture, etc... Our daughter sat in her bouncy chair.
Short answer: Keep your apartment LW!
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The big, moral fight
Okay, I agree the roommates totally are screwing the LW. But, unless this is an amazing, yet dirt cheap apartment in Manhattan or San Franciso (which I doubt, or he wouldn't need to share with others to be able to afford it) I say move. How much time, energy and $$$ should the LW be willing to spend on an apartment he can't afford?
The LW sounds like he needs financial help to move, he's not going to be able to afford a lawyer.
He should just find some nice share rental and move. He doesn't want to live with a newborn, sleeping through the night will be next to impossible for quite awhile.
It sucks, but I think he should pick his battles and again, all he would get from winning this is an apartment he can't afford. It's not worth it, even if he's "right".
He does need to get his name off of any leases or utilities right away, I wouldn't trust the roommates to be fair, they already have shown they're not.
