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I got angry at someone I was seeing for using drugs exactly once. He had gone into the bathroom and snorted coke without telling me during our date, and one likes a little bit of warning.
Beyond that--LW needs to move to Utah and find some nice girl who's never touched alcohol and is saving herself for marriage and homemaking. Because that's what it is, right? Horror that the woman he loves has a mind of her own and won't just adopt whatever arbitrary moral code he's set for himself?
I don't do drugs, but come on. Someone who is well-adjusted and clearly addicted to nothing stronger than coffee clearly deserves all the slack in the world. A man who can't give it to her has issues that he needs to deal with before he casts a disapproving eye.