Letters to the Editor
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Just be ready....
Unlike Judgy, I made several really, really baaaaad calls early on in life--I hope not to make too many more, but we'll see. Anyway, I got out of them, and learned from them, and thought, naively, that now I could give those experiences a purpose by using them to help others. "I've been there," I could say, "and this is how you get out," OR "I've been there, and believe me, you don't want to go." Presto! Bad judgment vindicated! Sins atoned for!
Bwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have tried many times to help friends, relatives, coworkers, online correspondents, whomever. And I have been told many times that: "you really listen;" "you don't judge me," "you understand;" "wow, that makes sense," "I'm sure you're right," and then the friend, sister, brother, mother-in-law (I kid you not), person-from-Iowa-on-message-boards, whoever, goes ahead and does the same stupid thing that I had tried to help them avoid. Apparently my years of idiocy are meaningless, and most people have to learn the very hard way.
I would have to say to Judgy--you can care for someone, and still think they're making a bad choice, or even that they are, truly, morons. There are a couple of people that I really want to thump on the head. They are going to do the same foolish things that they had always planned to do. My job now is to keep in contact, try periodically to help them, as long as my sanity is not endangered, and to be there when their houses of cards eventually collapse--which they will. Then, I can help them clean up and nod when they say things like, "now I understand why there's a commandment about this," and "well, I can at least use my experience to help others." "You do that," I'll tell them, "I'm sure you'll really save someone a lot of pain."
cim902