Letters to the Editor
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How about teaching her (and maybe yourself) how to text message?
That way there is no pressure on her to pick up a call when she’s driving or she’s got too many things going on to concentrate on your conversation. She can just text you back when she’s got a moment with two free hands.
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So: LW, Do You Have the Plan?
Cary's nonsense won't help. Wow. That's a new development.
But the suggestions here, will.
a) Lay off.
b) Exercise patience.
c) Fnd out if she's holding the phone properly. With my phone, I have to move it around on my ear to find the sweet spot. And I definitely have to make sure there's not a strand of hair between phone and ear.
d) Ask her to try a Bluetooth or an earbud--they improve sound quality dramatically, while freeing one's hands for little unimportant tasks like driving a car or a grocery cart.
e) Thank your lucky stars that you have a wife who loves you, who's willing to put up with your annoyance at HER, when neither of you knows squat about the proper use of a cell phone.
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Seriously, Carey...
Does this count as a problem in need of an advice columnist? LW, I hope your wife isn't talking while driving. Then you'll have someone writing in to an advice columnist because they've lost a loved one because of an ignorant driver. There's a problem no amount of advice could solve.
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OMG
Texting while driving is stupid, but talking isn't?! Right you are.
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Slow letter week? month?
Let's see: a couple days ago, it was someone all angsty because their roommate HELD HER CAT THE WRONG WAY and today it is someone whose wife can't talk properly into a cell phone! What's next -- people who can't wipe their own asses? Probably! Is this seriously the "best pick" of all the letters that Mr. Tennis receives in a week? Is he just tired of answering letters from people who can't decide which city to relocate to, or how to accept the ennui of having to work for a living instead of being "teh great artiste"?
That being said, yeah I loved the bit about the big black rotary phone cold-cocking Mannix. I'm 51 and I have one of those big black bakelite jobs in my basement, waiting for the breakdown of the cell phone monopoly. (And yeah, it is the only phone that works when the power grid is down.) What I really miss is A. super clear phone calls where you can hear every word and B. a world where everyone isn't constantly on the phone yacking about nothing.
Today, when I visit a friend, or ride in the car with someone, god forbid anybody talk to the people who are actually PRESENT -- no, that's too boring and low tech -- the occasion immediately demands that one party (or both) get on the cell phone and yack to someone who IS NOT THERE. While I respect that a cell phone (and no, I don't have one or want one) is valuable in an emergency like a car crash or terrorist attack, 99.9999% of the time they are used for the most useless blathering imaginable...."I am at the store getting ice cream...what flavor should I get? Chocolate? Cookies and Cream? Vanilla Fudge? I don't know. What do you think? blatherblatherblatherblather...."
Cell phones have turned us into a nation of people who can't even manage a trip to the convenience store for a quart of ice cream on our own without validation, often from more than one person. We are victims of a work culture, where the tiniest decisions must be micro-managed and second-guessed, and god forbid we can't be "gotten ahold of" on a moments notice, even at 3AM while on vacation.
It's ruined movies, summer breaks, eating out, quiet drives in the country, bus rides, and everything else you can think of. Frankly, when I get in my car, I genuinely appreciate a nice chunk of SILENCE, where I can listen to NPR without interruption or enjoy scenery or just veg out. I don't have to TALK TO SOMEONE every bleeping moment of the day.
So LW: if your wife needs this phone for security on her long commute -- fine. That means it's for EMERGENCIES. If she (or you) are not hemmorhaging blood, then frankly neither of you need to be on the phone with one another. If she doesn't call, then you can take it that she is fine, which is what I am sure you thought in that long ago era...the 1990s....when she (and most people) didn't have a cell phone or even a need for a cell phone.
The idea that she should be TEXTING YOU while driving, when she can't even manage to talk on the phone, is sucicidal!!!! People get in horrible accidents this way. Tell her to stick the god-damned phone in her purse or glove compartment or wherever, and forget about it unless there is a life-threatening reason to use it.
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just a phone
i suspect shes got a mental block. i know plenty of people in their 40s who still consider cell phones to be new fangled and not worth figuring out. what they dont get is that a cell phone is just a phone. yeah its got extras, but its still just a phone.
id reccomend first of all getting her a phone totally free of all said extras. get rid of the color screen, get rid of the games and internet browsing capabilities. get her one of those shitty little non-flip phones that they give you for free when you sign up for a 40 minute-a-month plan. this will reassure that hey, its just like the phone we have at home. i also second the reccomendation that you have her use the cell phone at home, when she would normally use a land line. she wants to call a friend and chat? use the cell phone. when the phone becomes something used for chatting and conversations (instead of necessity calls like "hey come pick me up") she will realize that it functions exactly like any other phone. she sounds like shes using like a walkie talkie- meaning she thinks its only useful for quick conversations and commands.
i really think shes just convinced herself that it is some sort of special technology that requires some special skill set that she is too old to learn. just stress to her that its just a phone.
just
a
phone
also, what good ever came from payphones? was it that it cost about $2.00 a call to phone home from out of state? or the constant layer of grunge covering the receiver? or how about when the one payphone within walking distance wouldn't take your last handful of nickels and you'd end up stranded? oh cary, waxing nostalgic again.