It sounds like your wife is trying to talk on the phone when she is driving on this long commute of hers. Maybe it's too difficult for her to multitask this way. If you are really concerned with her safety, don't call her in the car! Ask her to call you before she gets on the road, if you must, but don't call her. If she breaks down and needs assistance, she always has the phone.

Also, try getting her to use the cell phone when she is at home rather than the landline. She may just need to practice with it when she is not trying to do something that requires her attention (like driving).

There will be a happy ending soon. Some short-tempered person in her vicinity will grab her phone, smash it under his foot, and that will be your solution.

(Sure hope your sex life isn't as halting and awkward as your cell life!)

I've seen this before. She's not holding the phone to her ear correctly. I'm betting the tiny speaker is right in the tip of the phone. Typically this is the case with flip phones. You have to get this speaker right over the opening of the ear, in order to hear what's going on. Often people will hold the flip part of the phone, with the screen in it, flat against the ear. The speaker winds up somewhere to the back of the external ear. This causes the exact problem you describe. Holding the very tip of the phone to your ear is an unnatural feeling for someone who is used to a full size handset. Have her try the speakerphone if you want to demonstrate that it is in fact possible to talk over a cell phone without much confusion.

There are actual technical reasons for having problems with cellphones, particularly the digital variety that are now the norm.

The first is the lack of "sidetone", a playback of your own voice to you as you speak. It not only confirms the phone is working, but helps you get the volume of your voice right. Landlines have had this since before most of us were born, and analog cell phones generally had it. The lack of it often causes people to think you can't hear them. The results are pauses, repeating, shouting, asking if you can hear them, etc.

The second is that at least with digital cell phones and providers I've used, if both parties speak at once you'll either hear the other person or they will hear you, but usually not both. So someone doesn't hear what the other said, or even know they had been talking. The technical term for this is "half duplex." Such a conversation is like using walkie-talkies, only the pressing of the 'talk' button has been automated.

I'm being half serious, but this might actually help: Use etiquette established many decades ago for two-way radio. Say "over" when you have finished speaking for the moment, so the other knows they can talk. Use words that can be more clearly recognized on an unreliable link, affirmative/negative instead of yeah/no, say again instead of huh, etc.

Perhaps a more practical solution is that some of the good bluetooth headsets have extra electronics to try to overcome cell phone shortcomings, and I've found using one a significant improvement whether sitting in a quiet room or in a car with plenty of background noise. It may also help that the speaker is actually slightly in the ear and unlike holding a small phone certain people won't have the subconscious need to move the phone between their ear and mouth.

Texting is stupid.

have no problem texting. Its pretty much a requirement when dating so age can't be the problem here. I've found its more like married people have no concept of the convenience of text.

Somehow, I don't really think it's the relationship, I think it's the cell phone. Depending on your provider and the specific cell phone model you use, it can be awfully difficult hearing what's going on. From my own experience, I find it much more difficult to talk on a cell phone than on a land-line. I think my difficulty has to do with the sound compression, the tiny-tiny-tinny speaker used in most cell phones, and maybe the lack of side tones (although, I think most modern cell phones have this).

A few suggestions that have worked for me: (1) the LW might consider that it's not his wife's cell phone but his. Specifically, ambient noises around him may seem very loud and distracting to his wife. If his cell phone has a noise canceling feature, he should activate it since those features are designed to reduce how much ambient noise gets picked up. (2) The wife and maybe also the LW might consider using an ear-phone style headset. I'm particularly fond of the type that has both a left and right earpiece and can hear and talk most comfortably and naturally when using one.

Text messaging is also a great option. I picked it up a few years ago, and it's really indispensable for me. Generally, I prefer it to gabbing on the phone.

I broadly agree with Cary about public facilities, and cell phones can be a nuisance, but pay phones are phil-thee!

How about a. not calling your wife when she's commuting and b. getting her a headset and tell her to use it whenever she commutes?

That way, if you or someone else happen to call in, all she has to do is hit a simple button. That's one gesture compared to the more complex task of finding the phone, flipping it open and then figuring out how to hold it to the ear properly.

But then, there are just some people who are utterly incompatible with technology. Teach your wife to call you. Teach your wife to call 911. Type up instructions for her, laminate it and put it in her wallet. That way, if she does get into trouble, she'll know what to do.

But my god, stop calling her if your blood pressure rises every time! It's not worth it.