Letters to the Editor
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Re: No end in sight.
All right, all right, Chickadee, I have to concede that a person's got a right to set limits on guest stays.
I just find it unnerving that so many people have the initial reaction of being wigged out and unfriendly. Yes, the vast majority of people you meet on this planet are going to be a little eccentric--that's what they used to call being an individual and/or having a personality--but they'll also be essentially well-intentioned, in my experience. It's possible to set boundaries and still be nice to them, ya know?
(And no, I'm not from some farm in Iowa; I've lived in a few big cities, had lots of roomies, etc. Almost always, I could put up with their shortcomings; they, in term, almost always put up with mine. If you don't want to deal with roomies, get a studio!)
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Dealing with a roomie is one thing
Deal with roomie's extended family here for an indefinite stay is another. It's not to be tolerated. And it's not to be trivialized. Possession of property is a huge deal and that's why there's reams of legislation and litigation around it. Don't be stupid and think this issue is of no consquence. It is and it needs to be dealt with promptly or the legal ramifications could be extremely costly.
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its funny...
To all you people who say people should be gracious, should "just be cool", people are'nt trusting of others enough...Hey WAIT A MINUTE! aren't you that dude sleeping on my couch? who smokes all my weed while I'm at work? seriously man you need to find another place to crash...
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Sometimes, you just have to ask.
Please, LW, I really, really need a follow up for this.
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All my what?
Ok, maybe emanating has a point--if this girl's mom refuses to leave AND smokes up all the weed, well then, definitely throw her out!
Or maybe the people who can't afford their own place because they're blowing all their cash on grass and playstation games should just accept the fact that there's a period in your life when you are not king of your own castle.
PS--this couch is really lumpy--do you have an extra pillow or something, man?
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Now I know how people get conned or treated poorly in their own homes.
Hi, I'm sally nice to meet ya, this is my mom, she'll be staying one night, I mean a few days, now a week, possibly all summer!
Oh be nice, suck it up, you know it wasn't the agreement made but most spoiled selfish assholes expect you to be the "bigger person" be nice and accomadating, don't sweat the small stuff. Towels on the floor is small stuff, eating your leftovers is small stuff. This is not the subletter is messy, she's noisy, she plays her music loudly or takes forever in the bathroom. She brought another human being in who doesn't pay rent into her sublet without even asking if it was okay first!
Now if this girl is so sick she needs mom, that is something that has to be disclosed, it does not mean she has to disclose what the illness is, just that it requires assistance that requires an animal or human helper. While it's illegal to refuse to rent something to someone because they have a guide dog or a nurse, it just makes it further suspicious that the subletter didn't say I need mommy to play nurse because I'm sick.
But the subletter didn't say any of this, she just moved her mom in figuring no one is going to kick out someone's mother when their little girl is sick. It's selfish, inconsiderate and rude and frankly, I doubt her illness requires assistance. Otherwise, she'd live with her mom at moms place and save the cash.
No one is saying the LW should sit down and say look you lying little bitch get your mom out of here or you are packing now!
They are just saying she needs to sit down with subletter and explain the rules, like you are renting a room for a summer, not you and your mom. Mom has to go, by tommorow, there was no agreement to move your mom in too, if you are too sick to live without a nurse then either mom pays rent too or you both have to move so I can find a new subletter.
Allowing the agreement to be adjusted to allow mom to stay once money changes hands would be nice, allowing some woman to stay as long as she likes while it makes you unhappy because she's related to your subletter is being a pushover.
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Fair Housing Act doesn't apply to this LW
either way, i would venture that this LW falls into one of the following categories below.
personally, if it was me, i would not have a problem with asking the both of them to vacate within 24 hours since whatever "agreement" someone had with someone else is now null and void, unless they could show me something written down with all signatures. and which of course if they could show as much, mom most certainly wouldn't be on that agreement.
i would also have a problem at this point keeping the subletter under ANY circumstance because mom is sure to return in some way or another. and she wouldn't be a happy mommy at that point.
TRUST is a fundamental when having rooommates. when that trust is vacated then the roommate needs to also be vacated from the premises.
i don't care if this girl is "sick;" LW didn't sign up to deal with sick people, but of course, we all know this subletter isn't really sick at all. nice excuse though. worked didn't it?
Fair Housing Act
803(b) Exemptions
803(b)(1): Exempts people with fewer than 3 rental properties
803(b)(2): Exempts "rooms or units in dwellings containing living quarters occupied or intended to be occupied by no more than four families living independently of each other, if the owner actually maintains and occupies one of such living quarters as his residence."
http://www.usdoj.gov/crt/housing/title8.htm
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@akaSmith - we're talking apples and oranges here
You keep talking about disabilities, but there is nothing in the original post to suggest that there is in fact a disability. I respectfully suggest that you are looking at this from a limited perspective. Perhaps we all are, but again, as yet, nothing suggests there is a disability. There are too many other, equally plausible, possibly more nefarious possibilities.
If one person rents a room and two appear to move in, there's a legitimate issue. LW has the right to know if the mom is planning on leaving soon or not. She should check her lease and the local laws, but she probably has the right to demand additional payment and/or tell the woman to leave. If she doesn't protect her rights soon, she may lose them.
If it's stated that the second person is there because the first is ill, special accommodations are being requested on the basis of that illness. But is there really an illness? If so, what is it? Is it contagious, or otherwise a threat to LW? How long would the mother like to stay? Why is this necessary? Is this acceptable to LW? What compensation, if any, would LW expect? Is the mother willing to pay it? The room was not sub-let to the mother, she can't just move in.
If the daughter does in fact have a disability as defined by law, she can either say nothing and be entitled to no special accommodations, or she can provide legal or medical verification that her mother does in fact need to be there. There is nothing in the law that says LW has to somehow psychically devine if the roommate has a disability or if these two are trying to pull a fast one. The fact the the roommate might have a disability doesn't deny LW her rights!