Don't ever stay with a company out of loyalty. You have to think of your career and do what's in your best interest. The economy is VERY unforgiving these days. Businesses close all the time. If you find yourself out of a job, you may not find a well-paying again. Not to sound dramatic, but it's true. Just look at the bankruptcy rates in the U.S. All of those people...good people...had nice jobs that suddenly went away due to outsourcing, offshoring, rightsizing, you name it.

Being noble doesn't pay the rent. When it comes to work, I think of my bills before a boss' feelings. Sorry. I like to eat!!

You write that your leaving would damage the company, and that you were hired to bring the owners's vision to life - yet the products you are producing are failing??? Has it occured to you that your leaving might be the best thing that ever happened to the company??? Are you sure that you're helping and not hurting the business?

I own a business. I had an employee years ago that I knew wasn't doing the job that I was paying for, but I was afraid that I couldn't (at an early stage in my business) do without him - and so I put up with crap. Well, he quit on me in a last minute, by the way I'm not doing the work screw you kind of fashion. The first two weeks were hell. BUT, he was holding back my business, absorbing energy, emotion, and resources and NOT doing the job. His quitting was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Perhaps the LW needs to do some honest accounting with herself. If, however, she decides to jump, first she must make sure that her employer is not pocketing her health care, FICA, and W2 payments. The comment that the employer always find the money to stay afloat should be a red flag. She owes her employer an honest day's work for an honest day's pay - and two weeks' notice and a departure that doesn't burn any bridges.

The dog-eat-dog mentality of work in the USA turns us against each other. The phrase, “its just business” is unique to America.

The phrase probably is unique, but the mentality exists elsewhere. I am an American working for a European company. While I wouldn't call it dog-eat dog in my company (or in any company I've worked for in the US, actually) the main reason why people aren't fired for non-performance in, say, Germany (IME) isn't "family", it's law. (My company has been good to its people when Real Life got in the way, but that's company culture. Same thing can be found in the US--I've benefited from it.) And if people aren't happy at the company for whatever reason, they leave.

This same law impacts a company's hiring practices. German companies like hiring contractors because they can fire them if they're not performing or can't afford them. And they do.

Dear Comrade Cary,

Today my boss was denounced at a big Party meeting for making statements critical of my country's armed invasion of Czechoslovakia. I have always been loyal to my boss, but there's a chance that I could get a much better job if I join in with the people who are denouncing him.

I feel bad for being disloyal to him, we have been friends since we were children. But I could use the extra money from this better job. Three years ago I applied for a car, and I'd like to be able to afford one if I ever move to the front of the line to get one.

What should I do?

If they decide to cut back the staff to save money and your job is one of the ones cut, will your boss refuse to do it? No. Work is work. You have better opportunities, take it and leave on a good note. Its a small world and you might end up working with/for some of your coworkers again down the road.

Hmmmm… The LW says that 2 years ago his/her “boss hired me to bring his vision of the product to life” but “that we've been working on products that for the past year have been failing miserably, and the future doesn't look all that bright.” At best, the LW isn’t so hot at picking products or companies to devote his/her professional energies, but at worst, the LW is why the product (and the company) are failing. Probably the truth’s in the middle, e.g., LW wasn’t given the resources to execute the brilliant marketing plan, or whatever. In some way, the company has probably failed the LW and vice versa.

End result: the LW has some work to do, on both career and personal growth fronts. On the career growth front, the LW needs to examine whatever his/her contributions are to the problem, including figuring out how to avoid replicating the same mistakes, e.g., equating probability of success with the presence of optimistic people who talk about great products and sky high potentials. On the personal growth, he/she needs to question the reasons behind the swings between self-aggrandizement (“my leaving could possibly have fatal implications”) and doormat tendencies disguised as superior character traits (“I am such a loyal person”).

In interpreting the workplace in terms of family dynamics, the LW is defining his/herself as a child relative to the boss, making it hard to speak truth to power (here’s why your product’s failing, boss) or to give oneself the power to change the circumstances (on to the next job). If the LW doesn’t get a handle on it, the new opportunity will disappoint: The hero/victim dynamic and faux family projection won’t play out well when the new boss is “a good friend” whether actually or allegedly.

Be certain you are not replacing one failing company with another. As another poster said, you are thinking about working for a start-up. How many are successful in your industry?

If you leave, get your final paycheck and IMMEDIATELY go to the bank the check is drawn from and cash it. Trust me, I learned this painful and expensive lesson when I left a small, failing company and my final paycheck bounced.

Good luck....

Nancy