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I can see where the guy would be uncomfortable. Or think it's wierd. Or whatever. But geez, it didn't leave some sort of mark on her, a stain or scarlett letter. It was a moment in time, forever gone.
The problem isn't his reaction to that moment, a bit of revulsion or jealousy or discomfort. The problem is his obsessive thoughts about it, his complete refusal to do the work to get over it (not "forgive" her - there's nothing to forgive, she didn't do it "to" him and she didn't commit a crime).
My god, the man is an insensitive and immature jerk. If you love someone you try to work through inconsequential stuff that bugs you due to your own insecurities or wiring. Mom told you mushrooms were like "mold" and now you hate that your fiance eats them. Get over it.
Somehow you got it into your head that the threesome you dreamt of having with two girls was dirty and slutty if it happened to the girl you now love.
Get over it.
It's not her problem, it's his.
This is not about feminism. I've had to "get over" the past of the men I've dated more than they've had to get over mine. And now that I'm in my 40's and single, I certainly have no fricken business (let alone time or a huge selection) to go rejecting anyone for having engaged IN THE PAST in harmless behavior that sets off my prudishness alarm.
There are many women who get all pissy about their man's exes (and excess) and I'd say the same thing. Get over it. He's here now and he's committed to you now and the one who's making them an issue is YOU, not him.
She's not inviting those two other people into the relationship - she was done with them long ago. He's made them permanent guests.
Can you imagine, after these two got married, and he flipped out continuously until she couldn't take it any more - and then here he is 10 years older, and divorced, and meeting women who are 10 years older, and divorced, and him being completely unable to be with anyone? I mean, all those divorced women with their sexual histories, their commitment to one man above all others BEFORE he came into the picture? Or the fact that children fathered by someone else emerged from their wombs, their vaginas indelibly marred by the fruits of foreign sperm?
He'd obsess himself into perpetual loneliness, for no woman will be chaste and pure and unmarked enough for him.
The man is a fool.
