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The guys who get freaked out over their girlfriend in a threesome are the same guys who are disgusted by the idea of male homosexuality, but would happily pay to watch female homosexuals getting it on. In other words, hypocrites who think that anything that doesn't personally turn THEM on is "sick," but whatever they dig is fine. Sex is "sacred" but that lap dance at the bachelor party was just a guy thing, honey... you know it didn't mean anything!
LW, you deserve better than someone who looks down on you and judges you harshly. It is NEVER going to change. It will just get uglier and uglier between you. I know what it's like to let the memories of when you were happy together override what the relationship has become. You hold out, hoping that one day you can magically get back to the way it was. You can't. It is what it is now, and happiness with him is behind you. His view of you has turned sour, and if you stay together he will continue to punish you by making you feel inferior. You'll be forever apologizing and trying to get back in his good graces.
I'm sorry to be so blunt and so negative, but sometimes reality is unpleasant. Sometimes things DON'T work out, and when your boyfriend no longer likes you and doesn't have a kind word or thought for you, you have to accept that it's over. His love was conditional. You've done nothing wrong... you and he are just not compatible.
And as you can obviously see the importance of judging someone on the present instead of the past, you must do it yourself as well. Judge this relationship for what it is, not what it was. Because that relationship no longer exists. I'm sorry.
