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My boyfriend freaked out because I had a threesome It happened before we were together, but he can't handle it and he's being a real jerk.
  • Whoa... I thought that this was MY letter

    I sent something similar to Tennis a year or two ago. Maybe this is a composite? I doubt it - freaks me out to think that other women have to deal with this.

    OK, so as to the nuts thing: who can say? What LW's boyfriend is is INCREDIBLY insecure. We're talking, like, unbelievably insecure. How do I know? Because I'm dating LW's boyfriend's clone. My boyfriend had many, many fewer past sex partners than I did when we met (although you never would have known - he lied about it), and he couldn't STAND the idea that I had had sex with more than one person at a time. He had the same symptoms: the nausea, the anger, the ability to shriek at me but not to talk to a therapist. And it was ALL about insecurity. It didn't matter to him that he was the best I ever had - it mattered that he didn't feel that he could "match" me.

    I went through three years of hell over a threesome that I had had ages before I met my boyfriend. Name calling, screaming fits, days of the silent treatment. Passive aggressive behavior, public humiliation.

    He will not get over it. Get out. Move on. There are better guys out there.

    AND.

    DO NOT APOLOGIZE for your past. Unless you murdered kittens or have serious hurt people, do not let someone else make you regret what you have done. Threesomes can be a blast, and they are nothing to apologize for.

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