Your instincts are clearly not up to this task. You let some "skeeve" into your house to sell him your panties. You need to factor in the risk and hidden costs of this life choice into the equation. The return not nearly as high as you think.

You may also want to consider some therapy. Seriously. I find it concerning that you would consider this your only option to make more money. The scenario you paint is almost delusional -- there are many other options.

Please - confide in a trustworthy friend, preferrably a professional.

It's possible that she didn't invite him into her house. Although, the "when he left" does seem to imply her abode.

Where else would she stay put for an hour after selling some dude panties? Unless you were already home, wouldn't you split from any location where such a sordid transaction took place?

I think it's not a stretch.

But you are right, she didn't explicitly say it.

I doubt you are the only one, and the way things are going you may get your wish. I don't see why women can't have the best of both worlds, enforced prudery for men AND jobs, education and money for women.

"...after he left." where? the bar? the coffee shop? her house?

I just happen to give her more credit than to assume it was the latter, and I abhor the mean-spirited dumping on someone facing a spiritual, material and moral dilemma based on reading between the lines.

Get yourself to a headhunter or vocational counselor and get yourself one decent full-time job; these two part-time job situations never add up to a hill of beans. You're young, you certainly must have computer skills, and you can do a lot better than selling yourself out to trash culture and tossing and turning in bed with a troubled mind. The amazing financial advisor Suze Orman (she has a call-in advice show on CNBC) says it all and says it best in her wise sign-off: "Remember: People first, then money, then things -- now YOU stay safe."

Look, as I was trying to go to sleep I realized I shouldn't have written that last letter.

I am in severe pain pretty much all the time. My teeth hurt in a way I couldn't even describe. One of my knees feels like it is going to collapse with every step. I have a foot that I wish I could cut off and I have a sprained wrist. I also have a hernia which I can feel subcutaneously. I don't really know what to do. I asked for help so many times to so many different people that I realize now that there will never be any help.

To the letter writer that said I am a failure: I know. I already know.

I am ready to die.

Like I said, I am sorry. I am in severe physical pain and it seriously alters my personality sometimes. Also, I have alot of other untreated problems too that everybody who reads these letters knows about already. Sorry about that.

To the letter writer: do whatever you can to succeed. If you do not succeed you will be lost and cast out into the darkest pit of despair. I know. I know.

Stop whining.

Teaching at the college level has a lot to be said for it, especially if (like me) you're at a small, private college where the teaching is valued and the research expectations are not extreme. On the other hand, research facilities aren't that great either but you can't have it both ways.

It would be good if the LW could have some teaching experiences before committing to this line of work. You need to be at least a little extroverted, you need to have a thick skin at times and a lot of the work such as grading is just tedious, even painful: this week I have to participate in a hearing for someone I charged with plagiarism. I'm not complaining, I really like teaching but these are things that an inexperienced person doesn't necessarily think about and that might be deal-breakers, ultimately. The other thing is: you spend a lot of time working on a degree for a job that isn't really going to pay that much. While I don't agree with all the gloom and doom, it might be easier to get a job and you'll have a greater affect on others if you teach younger people (but I'm sure that's also more work).

Oh yeah, the fetish video thing: I don't know anything about that stuff but if you can do the work without your face showing and you're not nude and you work under an alias, maybe it's not so big a deal. It would depend on what you had to do.

Cary's advice was superb, but it worried me because I thought he missed something. LW wants to make money, and the PhD is, in part, about getting onto a better career track. Not entirely, the love of teaching is there, too. Teaching is what LW wants to do with her life, and for that reason, I say go for it. But I thought there was a sentiment of "When I've got my PhD, I'll be making better money, which I need."

Sadly there's a very good chance LW will get that PhD and still be working temp jobs. The market is bad. I only have an MA, and I'm debating whether going through a PhD program is worth it. There just aren't that many jobs, and the horrible practice of splitting full-time positions into several adjunct positions seems to be happening more and more. Granted, the adjunct faculty pay is probably better than the jobs LW has now (though it depends; I think working at a high-end restaurant might bring in more through tips than your average adjunct makes). But it's not at all easy to get a full-time job at a university, and an adjunct position means no health care benefits (which some service industry jobs give to part-timers; Starbucks does). I think it's a good thing that Czarina brought the situation up.

LW needs to be informed about where the larger decision is leading, as well as where her decision about making the money to get there can lead.