Letters to the Editor
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WOW!
OK. Were pushing 150 letters on a story that was published this morning. This is very much like the letters fury earlier this year when another woman asked Cary some shaved/not shaved question. Why does the debate over shaving get so many responses?
Well, we have learned one thing here. If you want a lot of hits to your website, write about body hair and hair removal. Maybe Salon should get Nair to buy some ad space.
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Just had to step in here....
I don't know if somebody else has addressed this or not (way too many letters to wade through), but I wanted to say something about the shaved porn stars. They don't shave to promote some kind of infantilized version of women. They shave for practical reasons. It's easier to have those ridiculous amounts of artificially drawn-out, not-so-pleasurable sex when you are fully shaved and lubed. Otherwise things rub and itch and that's no fun for anyone.
I also find the infantilization idea silly, especially coming from women/men who shave their legs and armpits/expect their ladies to be shaven there. That doesn't make women look like little girls, does it?
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Your bush, your choice
Being in my mid-20's and working as a sex educator with both teens and adults, I have definitely noticed that it has become the norm for women to have a hairless cooch. It is as normalized and expected as shorn armpits. Most of my hetero girl friends either shave every day as part of their showering routine or have a standing appointment at their favorite waxer.
It is a perfectly legitimate choice to hedge the shrubs, as well as a perfectly legitimate preference to have a partner do so. It does not necessarily mean that you have low self-esteem and will compromise your sense of self or womanhood for the sake of a partner. It also doesn't mean that your partner is a pedophile or watches too much porn. Yes, I believe that shaving can be linked to a desire to look pre-pubescent, but couldn't the same be said for shaving one's legs?
With all that said, it is also a perfectly legitimate choice to bear your full bush proudly, and there are plenty of partners out there who do not prefer the hairless look or simply do not care. At the end of the day it is a personal choice and should be regarded as such, without judgement on those who choose otherwise. Partners might show a preference, but if they are looking for something more than a one-night stand (well, and most of the time, even if they aren't...), it's most likely not going to be a deal breaker, so you shouldn't let it be either.
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Pubic hair is gross
Just like leg hair and underarm hair.
I'm sure if you trace the trend of women shaving their legs and underarms back far enough, you would find that many women were initially resistant and that the women who first did it, did so because they felt the need to "compete" with younger women. Pubic hair removal is just the logical extension of that motivation. But I can totally picture how the naysayers back then complained about how "infantile" the shavers looked, and how gross it was, etc....
My wife tried it a time or two, and sort of liked it, but not enough to justify all the trouble. I'm a big fan of cunnilingus, and it's way better with little or no hair down there. I would prefer it if my wife shaved, but her reluctance certainly doesn't stop me from goin' down, that for sure!
And yes, I've tried shaving my own, and appreciate how good it feels, and how much trouble it is. To each their own, I say.
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Here's what it comes down to:
If it is more important to you to have a partner whose tastes you do not find repulsive, then keep your hair and your partners will self-select.
If it is more important to you to have sex, any sex, no matter how repulsive you find your partner's tastes, then remove your hair.
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Maybe after Dubya...
...nobody can stand bush of any kind.
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geography-specific
I'm a swimmer in flyover land, so I have reason to shave what would show beyond my swimsuit and I also get a regular look at a lot of other female swimmers in the showers. Most of them shave just up to where their swimsuits cover. The complete shave/wax sounds like some kind of coastal/urban obsession. Last time I lived in a city larger than 3 million, everyone was doing brazilian waxes, but out here in the bush - so to speak - people could care less.
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It's simple
Move to Alaska. Or anywhere North. Not only is it just plain practical to have as much hair as possible, the men love it.
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Theory Aside
All theory aside, this does stem from practical reasons, and many have been discussed in other letters. Here's another one: being shaved makes oral sex easier or more enjoyable for the giver (and perhaps the recipient). This goes for all sexes, and I think other readers may tell you that shaving is starting to catch on for men as well. One could also consider the positive aspects of sexual interest in female genitalia in that exploring it in detail is no longer taboo. Yes, shaving is uncomfortable, as is waxing, which is also costly and somewhat embarrassing. Not to mention both methods leave some people uncomfortable with total hairlessness and all that that entails. So here's the solution for both men and women. Buy and use an automatic hair shaver, the kind used to administer buzz cuts. This method eliminates pain, ingrown hairs, and leaves enough hair for those uncomfortable with hairlessness; yet it still trims enough hair to suit both practicality and aesthetics.
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Well...
I'm a redhead, so I consider it my full right and responsibility NOT to shave it. So I don't. I give a little trim here and there, but that's it. I don't think you should do anything for a man. If he wants you to change things about yourself than he is too high-maintenance and needs to go out and find what he wants- not try to change you into what he wants. Fuck that. So you don't like my redheaded hairy pussy? The door is right there.