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That's why we have the fantasy worlds. If you want to find true passionate love, then yes you have to be receptive of it but realize a guy who really likes you is not necessarily going to hire a string quartet to serenade you or send you flowers repeatedly to get your attention.
To find love you have to be open to it and yes you have to do a little playing. I met my husband in my art class, in fact I signed up for art class to find a man who would probably have things in common with me and as soon as I saw him I knew I wasn't going to try and leave it to advance to a higher course(as I could have as I was way more advanced). So I set myself up to be noticed. When break happended I waited till he left to see where he went. Then I positioned myself on a bench to make sure when he came back I was the first thing he saw, it TOTALLY worked. By making myself open he came over and started to talk and flirt with me. I would notice that he would draw me or sit next to me whenever he could. After a month or so of the flirting and rides home he got up the nerve to ask me out and we've been together ever since. So I totally agree with Cary's advise. I think that sometimes love just falls in your lap, but I think more often than not it is something you have to work towards the same way you do building a resume. You have to know that you want and make sure any object of your affection notices you. You can't be completely passive.
And appreciation of the small things really works wonders. I fall in love all over with my husband because of remembering all the things he did when we were dating, how he remembered what my favorite pie was and bought it for a surprise. Little notes to me, doodles he didn't know I knew about, inviting me totally into his life and introducing me to all of his friends right away.
In my opinion anyone can make grand gestures that can be genericly passed around and it's called romance, like candelight dinners, rose petaled bathrooms and bedrooms, but it's any gesture catered spefically to you that is truly romantic.
Plus it may be time to give up the romance novels for a while so as to not compare too much to any real hero you meet in life.
