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Unless this wife has, up till now, tolerated her husband’s preening self-regard in order to secretly feel morally superior to him (and in that sense is even a sort of accomplice) I would tend to want to defend her. She could be shy or have low self-esteem or do work that really engages her or have more compelling things on her mind than how she presents herself in public. Or she could really hate to shop.
The husband, on the other hand, has written quite a disturbing letter. Disturbing in the sense that it is really narcissistic, and as anyone who has ever lived with a person who has a narcissistic personality disorder knows, narcissists do tend to blame other people a lot.
