>I want to make a difference, create something I'm proud of (a book, I've always assumed), leave a legacy.

Cary nailed it - write that book!

Also, forget about your potential. That's a kid way of speaking. All your life people have been talking about your potential becuase you were a child. You're an adult now and the time for potential is over. The time for judgements like that are over too. You've made the investment in yourself, as have others no doubt based on that potential. Now it's payday. Time to take action and prove yourself.

Based on my experience and the experience of many others around me it isn't until you actually have to start doing things - rather than demonstrating how well you may do them one day - that failure becomes a real and terrifying prospect. Here's my prediction: you will fail. Anyone who tries to do things that are hard will fail. But they'll also succeed, at least some of the time.

So I say get out of that sheltered workshop job you're in. Stop thinking of yourself as a CV on some university administrator's desk and take ownership of your own life. It's your own adventure. You couldn't be better equipped and yet still there will be highs and lows and failures and achievements. That's a good thing. It makes life exciting.

But put all talk of potential in a drawer, lock it and throw away the key. You're just a normal person now with dreams and realities like everyone else.

I was also the top of the class student, had the ability to do whatever I turned my mind to, had the world at my feet. I also had a couple of passports, so I could live and work in other countries - which added to my choices and added to my stresses. I was brave and independent and practical and resourceful but couldn't decide what to do.

I did choose, back then, I chose to live in other countries and took the work that was easiest to get. I would find myself in a certain situation, through people I met/the neighbourhood I lived in, and the work came organically from there. For me my jobs didn't come from aiming for something in particular, but in picking the best of what was on offer. I just pursued those roles that were interesting more intensely than those that weren't.

I'm now 39, and I still don't have a passion in life, a purpose. I've made a good living in what I've fallen into, but could walk away from it tomorrow without missing it a bit. I've been restless as long as I can remember, and I've come to a place now where I just accept the restlessness, the questioning, as a part of me that won't necessarily get resolved. Ever.

I would counsel our LW to travel. The best thing about travelling, (and I'm not talking about a three week trip here) is that the assumptions I didn't even know I'd made about people and how the world works were challenged in highly valuable ways. And I loved the intellectual challenge of making sense of these different cultures, different ways of thinking. It changed me and I consider myself blessed to have had these experiences.

Our LW has limited expenses. I'd suggest stay at home, save as much as possible or sell everything, then go overseas for a year and live in another country (or three), whichever has some interest to her. Write her book there, while waiting tables and sharing a house with the locals. The knowledge gained from such experiences will sustain her whatever the future brings.

To me there is no greater salve to restlessness than self knowledge, the discovery of what one is made of, as that is the road to inner peace. New York, though a fabulous place to live, is only one place. Learn more about the world before deciding about the next step.

Whatever "it" is, do the scariest, hardest, most life-altering "things" NOW while you have the energy of youth. Life only feels more complex for many years down the road, and the inertia against change or grand gestures becomes weightier. Don't let gravity bring you down!

I am a little older than the LW, but I remember that feeling; I, too, was a "gifted child", and people kept talking about my incredible "potential" and how I could do great things with my potential and blah de blah de blah. And then I got laid off a few times, started a business I love but am ridiculously overqualified for, worked in it for 2 years, and got bored. Like the LW, I felt that I was "wasting" my potential, that there was so much more out there that I could be doing, that my brain was withering away; so I made a list of potential next steps I could take (join the Foreign Legion? Teach English in Thailand? Get a Ph.D. in Babylonian pottery?), narrowed it down, and kept narrowing it down until I found the one I wanted. This September, I start law school, and in 3 years I'll be a patent lawyer.

The thing I learned in my adventures so far is that the area in which we Make a Difference In The World (and yes, at age 23 I too thought in capital letters) can surprise you. I certainly didn't think that the job I love (and the job in which I'm certainly Making a Difference) will be the tiny little business that even I have trouble taking seriously.

I would strongly suggest that the LW go back to school to get a graduate degree of some kind; or take on a major project of some sort, like a novel or a screenplay or something like that. It's the best cure for "I'm wasting my life!"

Dear LW,

Wow, we have very similar issues, though I'm 20 years older than you. I still haven't solved my own, but these days I tend to speculate a lot about "if I were 20 years younger..." Either way, it's a very difficult place to be. There truly ARE so many routes to choose among at this point in the earth's history, especially if you're bright and talented. And what's going to be the very best use of your particular gifts? What is the world's most pressing problem to solve or most important topic to address as a writer? It's like a huge ball of yarn and you don't quite know which string to tug on to unravel the whole thing. But perhaps it's not important to find your True Destiny, as destiny has a way of finding us--no matter what corner we're cowering in.

That said, if I were you, I'd be tempted to go to grad school and get my MFA in creative writing. If you have the funds or are willing to take a loan, grad school's a great place to hang out for several years if you don't quite know what job you want. Plus, you're honing your craft, meeting lots of potential contacts/lovers/

references/pals, and getting feedback on your work on a daily basis, as well as motivation to keep writing (hopefully). You gain more time to consider your options, and in the meantime, you've bagged the terminal degree in your field, so that when you're 43 and wishing you had that master's so you could teach college, it's there for you. And, obviously, if you believe your legacy to be a book, this is a great way to begin to approach that goal.

I'd suggest going and visiting the creative writing departments at a few good schools and getting a feel for those places. If it feels right, you'll then have a lot more motivation to put in the applications.

You sound like a very cool person already, and I wish you GOOD LUCK!

PS--Forget the "potential" stuff; it'll only serve to drive you crazy. Lots of people who were told they had an abundance of it never used it, and many who were told they were idiots rose to positions of great prominence (e.g., president of the United States). It's actually a completely meaningless word when you think about it.