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Interesting, this is just like an ongoing discussion being hosted by the great sydicated sex columnist Dan Savage, in finer alternative publications nation wide. I decided not to post a link due to the fact that it is a serious adult discussion of sex, but i highly recommend seeking it out. Most of the points here have already been made there. There is an initial column and two follow ups. The thrust of the discussion: withholding sex is a form of emotional violence. Very heated letters on that topic, as we have seen here.