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Period.
I'm in kind of the same boat. My wife is almost always "too tired" for sex, which nowadays happens about once every few months. This causes me a tremendous amount of emotional pain, which I've told her about, which doesn't seem to matter to her in the least.
The bottom line is that if the other person really cares about the relationship, which means they really care about you, they will do what they need to to make sure this connection stays strong. It's understandable to be tired, or disinterested for a period of time following something like a pregnancy, but it is not a way of life.
What this guy is grappling with, basically, is the fact that his wife doesn't love him. She sees intimacy as a form of leverage, while he sees it as a basic element of a healthy marriage. And now that she's lost her leverage, she has nothing left. Neither does he, but he hasn't had anything for years.
God, do I hate women like this.