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Read other letters about this article
I agree with Cary's advice. He asks her to clarify the situation with her boyfriend and then say "yes" if the situation seems tenable. What's wrong with that?
"Out-and-out abusive?" She's clearly happy in the relationship. The LW says that this is "the best boyfriend she's ever had" and "he treats me like a queen" -- and assuming you don't doubt her ability to judge personality, I think a little hesitation or indecision before marriage is to be expected. Furthermore, as has been previously stated, the majority of her issues with his family would be mitigated by putting some distance between them. The rest can be discussed over time.
Paris sounds wonderful, don't you think?
