are American feminists more libertarian about sex than Swedish or English ones?

since both those places have passed draconian anti prostitution laws without, presumably, a big contribution from the christianist right.

I would say yes, although they might be learning their lesson.

This is another area of personal amusement. The very men who whine about the lack of good women in a world full of sluts are the ones whining at me to "put myself out there". Well, if I put myself out there, I wouldn't be a good woman anymore, would I. My value is in direct proportion to my chastity, the very quality I'm criticized for.

The irony is that I'm a mother. What do they think, that I did it once several years ago?

is there a minimum BMI or are certain/waist/hip or waist/tit ratios forbidden. What are the rules regarding cheekbones?

can you give me some specific guidelines on which women it is permissible to be attracted to and which ones will taint the atttractee with douchebaggery

It is only with deep meditation on the photo spreads of Maxim that a man can get to the truche...I mean douche...I mean truth...

Cripes it's getting late here!

as a hot chick?

It was very thorough.

There were countless lessons on probing into the fears and resentments which can chill a relationship. Yep, there were exercises too, you know, sensual massage, idle touching, stuff like that. We even got to see some very interesting film.

Still, we wondered: Sometimes, no matter how much touchy feely stuff they did, many couples' relationships remained cold and lonely, let's get it over with already affairs.

I piped up much to the professor's chagrin that I thought it was really all about chemistry, plain and simple, some people turn you on and some people just don't, and you can do all the hot tubbing and smooching in the world, and that basic chemistry won't change, that it is often the case that even people you think should turn you on, just don't turn you on, no matter how much interesting yellow panties and other thingies they may wear.

Lucky, it was a pass fail class, and the guy had to pass me.

I did not grow up to be a sex therapist, and that has made all the difference.

To 646, the poster who said that he doesn't want to date fat girls with great personalities, he wants a hot girl, I have this to say:

The fat girl with the great personality that you really like might hit the health club and go on a diet because she finally has a reason to look good and be in great shape for great sex.

The "hottie" might get fat and gorge herself because now that you are dating her she thinks you like her, and she will let herself go.

Also, you might be surprised at how many men have remarried or started dating women who were not at physically perfect as some hottie-type they originally went after because she was so "hot", but who proved to be impossible to tolerate.

Then there are the lucky guys who find the beautiful woman who is beautiful inside.

Love has a way of enobling people. Maybe more people should search for love and marriage and be less transfixed by a shallow value system involving hook-ups.

What you say has a lot of truth in it, Anonymous_Too. I will maintain that there are genuinely unskilled boys who need guidance, distinct from those kinds of Nice Guys who are passive-aggressive manipulators trying to get what they think they deserve. But your post makes one thing very clear: 'the Game' and strategies such as negging are not the kind of coaching that will help them. (In fact, I'll bet that genuine good guys will not fail to have at least great doubts, probably be simply repulsed, by this kind of manipulative strategy.)

Some men do need some coaching (and I'll bet some women do, too). I was pretty nerdy, and because of my ingrained distrust and even hatred of pretty much everybody else, I certainly lacked in all kinds of social skills (not only dating ones). My appearance was not simply naturally bad, I also stank and wore the worst kinds of clothes you can imagine. My sisters took care of me in my last year in highschool, and changed my image, which affected how others and I myself saw me. They also polished my skills at interacting with others, and pointed out all kinds of wrongs things I was doing ('Why don't you sometimes smile at people? You don't have to be a walking smiley, but frankly you also don't have to look like you constantly have a lemon in your mouth!', etc.)

But all in all, I think I agree with you. If you have a personality, and if you don't seem to be so darn dependent on getting a woman for self-justification ('scoring'), if you do have principles and ideals all your own that orient your life, you end up becoming interesting to others. Being desperate isn't going to help.

That we never get hit on... unless we're in a relationship.

There is nothing in this world more attractive to a very large percentage, and wide-range of women, than a man with a beautiful woman at his side.

Now, that's bad enough. Sure. But here's the fucked up thing. You don't even need a woman at your side! Just being in a relationship is a guaranteed, time honored chick magnet. Women can smell it.

We men go from, attractive to a large segment of the female population, to, persona non-gratis at a wedding reception, within about a month or two, after we've ended relationships.

I can't prove it scientifically, because I don't have the money to fund something that big, but girls, if you have ever wondered why, "all the good guys are taken," maybe you should wear noseplugs, or do whatever it takes not to be ruled by that relationship smell, and talk to a single guy. He's the one walking a little stiffly from not getting any for a while.