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Hm, you might actually talk to him about that. To put it comically, like in the old days, when the father would go to the nice-looking young man and ask, 'what are your intentions with respect to my daughter?' (My wife's father actually asked me this precise question. I was lucky I wasn't drinking anything when he said that.)
But seriously, if he is thinking about marriage (has the word already come up? Or is it just because of the Hierophant with the Lovers? The arcana maiora can mean different things, and there are different schools of interpretation...), he must -- assuming he is sincere -- be considering the obvious problems, right? She is younger, she hasn't gone to college, goes around with Goth musicians... What is his solution to all that? How does he intend to make it work? If he's in his forties, he must have already realized it doesn't all depend just on romantic feelings and idealism, right?
If it looks like it's becoming serious, then it's better to try to get to know him better. Gauge the risks. Vet him a little. Also find out what it is he represents for your daughter--a wiser guy who can tell her The Truth? A second daddy, just this time a nice one? A Strong Yet Nice Arm to hold her in moments of distress? A Sexual God that fills her with blissful lust? Or someone who she would like to help grow, with issues and problems like everybody else, and who might help her do the same?
I guess the line today is that people have to make their own mistakes. Children need to learn to survive by themselves.
For myself, when I look back at other girlfriends I had before I met my wife, I can see now (after over 8 years of living together and marriage) that, even though I really liked them, it wouldn't have worked with most of them. For most of the time I wasn't practical enough yet. I still needed to grow.
Yeah, talk to the guy and to your daughter, and try to form as good a picture of what is going on as you can. Notice the points of the picture that are logical and internally consistent, and mark the ones that might come from your imagination or the projection of past bad experiences for further inspection. And just Be Ready To Support Her No Matter What--she will have to make her own mistakes, but she's still your daughter.
I don't know if this helps--it doesn't look very well structured to me--but it's offered with a sincere desire to help--at least as much as this almost-39-year-old half-boy-half-man can, from a distance... ;-)
