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Everyone should go into romantic situations with expectations, and have lines that, if crossed, will make them leave the situation. You should know what you want from a situation, and what you can give. That's what being a healthy emotionally means. If your expectations are "this person will do my bidding," then, well, /that/ makes you a jerk.
Having expectations shows other people how to treat us. This is all basic, basic human stuff. It's got practically nothing to do with gender. And if you get some expectations/confidence, and people like you more, and what you learn from that is "people of the opposite sex are shallow/evil," you're not learning the right lesson.
