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If hot girls don't want to date you because you're not a big enough asshole, then they're idiots.
The question people young men should be pondering is not, "why won't hot girls date me" but rather "why would I want to date an idiot?"
One's standards for physical attraction should be on par with one's standards for basic intelligence.
If they're not, that's what causes conflict, not the fact that women wish to have the opportunities that were previously denied to their gender.