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years behind at WHAT, exactly? at performing gender-stereotyped activities? i mean, presumably this child is learning how to walk, talk, run, play; learning its preferences (likes soccer, painting, watermelon, doesn't like peanut butter, swings, scary movies), developing into a little person. What kinds of *really* important things are being missed if the child doesn't have society's expectations for gender behavior imposed on it? So when it realizes it's a girl, it's bad that the child is "behind" at simpering, flirting, preferring pink and disdaining sweaty activities? lots of parents would see that as a plus.
i just don't see what "catching up" this child would have to do.