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If this is true then why do ugly women, (or average women) turn down propositions from ugly men (or average men)far far FAR more often than the other way around. If two people claim to be starving but one refuses to eat an egg because it isn't cooked enough and is too runny can they both REALLY be equally hungry? I suppose you could try and stretch a point and answer "YES" if you were dealing in one case with a life threatening allergy.
At the very least we should admit that lots of women who attack men for being insufficiently deferential to women in the exact same manner that Laurel is doing actually agree with me on this point, like Smith. It's funny that when there are too possible positions on an issue people on BOTH sides attack, and consider themselves on the same side. It just demonstrates that it's really all about power and deference and not about the issue under discussion at all.