Heels , which I gather were invented, or popularized , by an Ancien Regime French Babe, were designed to be used to walk to the nearest bedroom, which should not be miles away. What's the matter with you people? Isn't it obvious? Don't tell me, you just have more interest in P.C.victimization than common sense...disigny

I love how the chick in Part 2 says that he "pussied (sp?) out" and that "I bet he'll pussy out"!

Among other things, I write for publications dedicated to getting women out of heels and into the corner office.

Is it my impression, or did the Broadsheet page just change, eliminating the pink color in the Salon symbol? This looks like a reaction to the points raised in the comments' threads. Hm! Grassroots politics does work.

By all means, do cultivate other values and other ways of being yourself -- intelligence, general knowledge, and artistic taste is quite high on my list of qualities to judge people (including women) by.

At the same time, let me point out that wanting to look pretty is not always, and not necessarily, a reflection of being a woman in a man's world. Looking attractive to the opposite (or same, as your taste may be) sex is also part of our nature. I think, as physico-spiritual beings, we need to be liked on both spheres: we want to be liked because of our soul (including intelligence, reason, etc.), and we want to be liked because of our bodies (including appearance, clothes, etc.). Both are OK, and men also try both (trust me, I was an 'ugly' guy at highschool, mostly because of my glasses and my skinniness (even today, after so many years, my naked body would probably evoke memories of Mickey Mouse rather than Governor Schwarzenegger), and I got duly ignored by the girls despite my top-quality grades and broad intellectual interests until I turned my intellect to the question of how to look more like they wanted me to look. I hasten to add that, for the reasons you mentioned, this need to 'look your best' is much more strongly felt by women; my point here is simply that men also hear this song.)

So don't despise your pretty- or hot-looking outfits; there are moments when they will be wonderful to look at, and they don't imply necessary slavery to men's desires. But I agree: it would be great to change stereotypes about how women should look by also stressing the value of other characteristics and bringing them out. Intellect is great!

@bigguns: how do you manage to meet so many female geniuses? I wouldn't mind meeting some myself! (No, I'm happily married. It's really just personal curiosity.)

"do you think that it is at all possible that women feel compelled, consciously or unconsciously, to garner this kind of attention because their primary value as females in a male-dominated society lies in their physical beauty?"

Yep. And I hate that. HATE IT. But I think we can and must resist it. I think we should pretend to be the thing we want to be. If we want to valued for our brains, then we should doff the heels and cultivate intellect. We might feel like phonies at first, faux brainiacs, but the longer one wears a mask, the more the face conforms to that mask and the more the brain conforms to those elevated expectations.

As I noted earlier, my sensibilities are informed by having regular contact with female geniuses. I spent this afternoon with a woman who scored second in Europe in their continental math competition and now oversees 30 male engineers at the age of 36 and that's a pretty standard afternoon for me. So, these unfrilled, magnificent women are my role models and my daily reminders that one doesn't have to wobble on heels to garner attention. These women command attention by dint of their brains and even more importantly, their backbones.

If I suggested that they shop for heels, they'd laugh and admit, "I don't have time."

The heels did not fit his foot correctly .....

If you feel weird, because you aren't wearing heels, that is your hang up. And if looking too librariany is unacceptable to you because you feel you need to appear a certain way to receive clients, again that's all in your head. One thing about business women's clothes I have found in recent years is that (especially with younger women) a rejection of professionalism (what you might call being librariany) in favor of filly clothes is a particular distraction. I would much rather trust my money to a librarian than Carrie Bradshaw which is how some women in business feel they need to dress.

I have to say with regard to thin soled shoes that I think maybe you have other foot problems that are making your shoes uncomfortable, (perhaps you are wearing too narrow of a shoe, a common problem in shoes now adays as so few shoes are mass produced for wide feet anymore) when I have worn thin souled shoes (mocasin or wrestling shoes, or you know slippers) they have been exceedingly comfortable, just like walking bare foot is comfortable if the surface isn't too cold or too hot.

If wearing pretty shoes is more important to you than comfort as it was with my friend, that's fine, but that is your choice and your choice alone. It isn't society making you wear heels, or uncomfortable shoes it is your own personal sense of style and an insistance on what you feel looks good.

"I think when women assert that they are semi-compelled to wear heels because they garner attention, the issue isn't men or even the attention.

It's: "Why do you feel compelled to garner so much attention?"

Doff the heels and spend some time unpacking that need for attention. Change is hard, but seek the change of not being so needy. It's tres cool to be freed of being watched because then you can watch."

Bigguns - do you think that it is at all possible that women feel compelled, consciously or unconsciously, to garner this kind of attention because their primary value as females in a male-dominated society lies in their physical beauty? People need to feel valued, and women are no exception. If women can achieve higher status and value and power in society by appearing attractive to men then is it any surprise that they do so? Hate the stereotype of women as "needy" - yuck. But I agree the need to be found attractive by men, whatever its cause, should be unpacked. I don't buy the ev psych theory that women are trying to attract a man so they can have a baby and be protected and provided for - double fucking yuck. Maybe it's one factor among many but not wholly explanatory. As if we can be reduced to animal nature and tens of thousands of years of human language and culture mean nothing.