Letters to the Editor
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You are only as "old?" as the body you feel?
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Observations by a anthropologist from the planet Alpha Centari 3
Biologically speaking it’s in a women's best interest for both herself and her child to have a mate that can provide adequately for them. Often a success male would have multiple mates since it is in his interest biologically to produce as many offspring as he can support.
This of course creates a tension between males seeking maximum off spring and female seeking maximum support.
I have heard it said that monogamy was introduced so that younger men had a chance at getting a mate too.
Another report suggests that they’re a fairly significant number of females in any population that have had children by men other than their chosen mate. (One of the reasons we almost automatically say, oh your child really resembles his/her father, is confirmation that the chosen mate and provider is indeed the biological father.)
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What science program did BS get their degree from?
Evolutionary biology has progressed far slower than the 50 years of cultural history BS cares about.
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Never too late.
But the rise of older fathers does explain at least one reason why some men consciously choose to date younger women.
No shit!
I'm in my 50's and planning to marry next month to a woman who is, let's just say, much younger than myself. I would like to have children ASAP, preferably before I die.
Why? Well, I made some bad choices in the past, chiefly deciding to postpone fatherhood until I was economically established and had traveled the world, and partly in poor choice of spouses, two of whom died young as a result of substance abuse.
George Orwell is probably my favorite writer. Well, we all have to have one, and though the Bible is, they say, a Good Book, I tend to want to read something a bit more modern.
Writing in 1942, at the height of World War II, Orwell, who had no biological children, though one adopted son, turns naturally to questions of sex and survival and he says:
For to look young after, say, thirty is largely a matter of wanting to do so... the well-to-do women who try to stay young at forty by means of physical-jerks, cosmetics and avoidance of child-bearing. The impulse to cling to youth at all costs, to attempt to preserve your sexual attraction, to see even in middle age a future for yourself and not merely for your children, is a thing of recent growth and has only precariously established itself.
It will probably disappear again when our standard of living drops and our birth-rate rises.
I don't think he got the last sentence right, but his point about only being as old as you feel remains valid, certainly it is not regarded as any great vanity in our society for middle aged people to see a future for themselves.
The modern buildings that you see
Are often most alarming
But I am sure that you'll agree
A ruin can be charming
It's never too late to be a beau
Experience counts a lot, you know
And it's never too late to fall in
Never too late to fall in
Never too late to fall in
Love
[Lyrics from The Boyfriend]
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Not sure why this must be an evolutionary phenomenon
I think this is interesting as a cultural phenomenon but it doesn't necessarily mean anything for the biological evolution of human beings.
What's more interesting, I think, is our impulse to explain all of our cultural practices through biology.
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Are women biologically drawn to older men?
Let me rephrase this question.
Are women biologically drawn to bright shiny objects such as diamonds to put on their fingers?
Are women biologically drawn to partners who have already built a nest that has no mortgage on it.
Are women biologically drawn to men whose estate and life insurance they will become heir to should he croak?
Now, you may think I am cynical but not so. Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, Silda Spitzer, top female lawyers all of them, from elite schools--two of them extremely attractive. Were they biologically drawn to their spouses who were struggling young lawyers? How come they did not marry professional athletes or movie stars?
Bad examples? Maybe, but while young people often think that sexual attraction and a mysterious, unanalysed process called "falling in love" explains all couplings, the truth is often different.
The facts are these. Sexual attraction to a very attractive partner is a huge factor in the first six months of a relationship, especially after a period of sexual starvation. Then reality sets in for the rest of your life. After a few years of domestic bliss you hardly notice your partner's looks. Hell you hardly notice their skin color, race, or what language they prefer, because they just become part of you and they are what they are and you love 'em. Or not, as the point may be.
A lot of people just decide to skip the falling in love thing and settle for reality from the get go. Are they less happy in the long run? Who knows?
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female preference for men who've been 'vetted'
This article failed to mention one of the reasons evolutionary psychology finds women prefer older mates. Just as Hillary Clinton says she's the only candidate who's been vetted, older men have been vetted by life experience. The very fact of their survival to a certain age speaks for the presence of genes for a certain amount of intelligence and physical strength. The younger, unproven male represents more of a gamble. The same strategy might operate in the opposite direction, except that female fertility drops off in middle age, thereby negating any evolutionary advantage to choosing an older woman. It's fine to say that the preferences are cultural, but when the preference is found everywhere, there must be an underlying cause in human nature.
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Ben Franklin on women
A single Man has not nearly the Value he would have in that State of Union. He is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd half of a Pair of Scissars...
Excellent. Ben should be invited to contribute regularly to Broadsheet.
http://personal.pitnet.net/primarysources/mistress.html
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Maybe older men are just better at meeting women.
I'm a guy in his forties, and from personal experience I can tell all you women-types out there that I am much more comfortable with women than when I was younger. Maybe older men (at least us dashingly handsome, witty, charming, buff, vegan and sincerely humble types) are just better at meeting women -- not just meeting them, but holding on to them.
I can't relate to the notion of having kids at this age of my life (or any age, for that matter), but I could see the willingness to do so to be yet another arrow in 40-something man's stash of women bait.