Letters to the Editor
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It IS the stupid people who need protection
that's why we want to exterminate sex offenders and child predators. that's why when an old woman gets on TV crying that the mean man charged her $20,000 to shovel her driveway we're all supposed to feel bad enough to send her some money.
Everything means 'No' eventually, sometimes.
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Maybe what he said wasn't politic...
But that doesn't mean it didn't have a grain of truth in it. The judge did not seem to be excusing the rapist at all, but he was making a statement that this young woman made a very foolish mistake by accepting a ride from a man that she didn't know and putting herself in a vulnerable position. No woman who has ever seen an after-school television special about the dangers of hitchhiking would make the mistake of getting into a car with someone they didn't know.
I am not trying to blame the victim here in any way. But women have to be conscious of the fact that there are plenty of bad people out there who will look to hurt you if you put yourself in a vulnerable position. How many cases to we read about women who find themselves raped after getting drunk at a party, or women who go missing after leaving a bar with someone that they just met. The cold hard truth is that it is dangerous out there and while you can't protect yourself in every circumstance, you can certainly take some precaution so that you don't hold a neon sign over your head that reads "Potential Victim Here".
I am a woman. And I would rather leave a bar sober, or walk a mile to a destination that end up a statistic.
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I'm with the judge
We live in a relatively safe culture. Sometimes we appear to go over board to take the risk out of everything. But there is no way to protect everyone from every harmful situation.
Getting in a car with a strange man, particularly if you're a child or a young woman is plain stupid and every child in North America has been warned against it consantly for the last 40 years that I know of.
That being said, the judge was probably piling on. I doubt the young woman needed to be reminded that it was a mistake to get in that car.
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Manners?
Canadians are such polite people. Surely, the judge might have expressed this more gently to someone who has already suffered a great deal.
Maybe it wouldn't get through?
Well, lawyers are valued for their communication skills.
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But what if?
Yeah sure it's always the victims fault... Blah blah blah, old rhetoric from a male judge. Didn't see that one coming....
BUT WHAT IF SHE REALLY WAS STUPID? FORREST GUMP STUPID! Stupid people should really be protected from sickos, hell everyone should be protected from sickos. Only 3 1/2 years for raping an 18 yearold in a cemetary. That rapist is a Ted Bundy in the making. So in my oppinion the judge fell short of his own judgement call of that girl. He's not protecting us well enough. What a total PUTZ!
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well
Stupid people need protection as much as anyone else, I suppose. And to suggest that all victims of rape are "smart" is no less eyebrow raising than suggesting that they are all "stupid." Undoubtedly, some stupid people are raped, and some stupid people are raped because the rapist was able to take advantage of their stupidity. It doesn't make the rape less of a crime, but I do think it highlights the need for people to be educated on how to protect themselves. It is stupid to get into a strange man's truck in this day and age, and there's no getting around that.
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I'm With the Judge, Too
The fact that the victim made a stupid choice doesn't relieve the attacker of culpability, but c'mon! Get into a car with a stranger? What did she think was going to happen?!
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Look at it this way
She WAS stupid to get in a car with a strange man, but at least the judge didn't tell her she deserved what she got, and then let the rapist go free.
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What do we do with the asshole people, though?
Like the judge.
Another commenter said, "The cold hard truth is that it is dangerous out there." No! Do you think she maybe noticed that after being raped?? So why the lecture after the fact?
Here's a truth: More people are decent out there than are predators. And those who are predators are pretty good at taking their opportunities. Whether you've been a victim of a predator has more to to with bad odds than vigilance against stupidity. Although it's comforting to think it only happens to stupid people, I'm sure.
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re: Look at it this way
Look at it this way
She WAS stupid to get in a car with a strange man, but at least the judge didn't tell her she deserved what she got, and then let the rapist go free.--anon
Some progress, eh?
On another note, it's a pretty sad world when we have to regard every stranger as a potential psycho.
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I'm not sure the judge was speaking to the victim.
From the link it looks like he may have been explaining his sentencing decision.
Without knowing the full facts of the case, I'd expect the defense to argue that this girl signaled consent when she got into a stranger's car, i.e., no one could be that stupid/naive. In order to find the accused guilty of rape and hand down a "serious" sentence, it would then be necessary to show that, yes, some people ARE that stupid--and the law must protect them. For the rapist to be a "vulture", the girl has to be the mouse.
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Making oneself a fictim...
I don't think anyone is going to argue that the one who shoulders the entirety of the blame for what happened to this young woman is the man who raped her. But It is also hard to argue with the fact that by her actions, this young woman put herself in an extremely dangerous situation where the chances of her being attacked in some way were drastically increased.
Anyone with two functioning braincells to rub together knows how dangerous it can be in the world. There are plenty of predetors of all sorts that will look for any opportunity, any vulnerability in order to get the upper hand with a possible victim. There is no way That you can completely immunize yourself from being a crime victim, but there are certainly things you can do to decrease the chances of it happening.
This is why we teach pre-school children the difference between good touch/bad touch. We teach schoolkids what to do if someone approaches them on the street, or tries to abduct them. We have public education programs about not being a victim of crime.
Still, people make mistakes and there are those out there who are just waiting for the opportunity. If you are "lucky", you might just be robbed. You might have your car stolen. You might lose something materials and a bit of your personal security. At worst, you may end up raped, or killed, or vanished.
Women and children are especially vulnerable. Most of these crimes (but not all) are committed by adult men who are physically stronger. If someone is determined to overpower you, there is a limit to what you can do after the fact. Once the assailant has the upper hand, the best you can hope for is to minimize the damage.
I know that a lot of women chafe at the idea of having to curtail their actions in any way to help protect themselves. No one likes the idea that we can't go where we want and do whatever we'd like to at any time out of fear that you might be assaulted. But look at some of the more notorious cases in NYC in the past few years. A college student is out drinking by herself into the early morning and is raped and murdered by the bouncer who escorts her out while she's intoxicated. A teenaged girl who was out drinking with friends (all underaged) wanders off by herself after their car is towed away and her friend gets sick at the impound yard from drinking. This girl was later found raped and murdered. Or look at what happened to Nancy Holloway in Aruba - she goes out drinking (again underaged), goes off with some young men that she just met and has been missing ever since.
The best way to protect yourself is by being alert and showing a modicum of common sense. That doesn't mean that you might never be the victim of a crim, but you can drastically reduce the chances of that happening. That's what it's all about folks, reducing the odds in your favor.