Letters to the Editor
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division of labour
My partner and I have a pretty simple system -- I cook, he does the dishes (and we don't have a dishwasher, so this is almost a fair tradeoff... especially when we order take away... he still does the dishes!) It works out best for us because I have more cooking creativity, whereas he just kind of lacks that (eg when I ask him to cook dinner, I have to tell him what to cook, otherwise he frets). Thats our system (wouldn't work for everyone). I'd like to think we'd stick to it on the Holidays.
Maybe more families should do that? The cooks can cook (regardless of gender) and the people who didn't cook (including any children over 12) can do the clean-up. Fon't try that old chestnut and tell me an man is so incapable that he can't do dishes. Thats nonsense. A 12 year old can do dishes/dry dishes/put things away. In my family everyone always pitched in, in a way that suited their abilities.
Women may be the better cooks because thats how they were brought up, but thats no exuse for me to laze about all day on Thanksgiving!
I've also noticed a lot of women who don't get their husbands/BFs to do things because those clueless men just don't do things as well as we do... to which I say, if that's your attitude, you'll end up doing everything for everyone. Be less of a perfectionist, and give the people you want to help out good clear directions on what you want them to do! (No one, male or female, is a mindreader).
I think women will find that a lot of guys are happy to help out and be involved, so long as they aren't dealing with constant citicism that they didn't stack the dishes the 'right' way!