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You said: "so of course I took on the role of family protector, and with my sister that was no easy task"
You are the eldest? That is no surprise. I am also an eldest. I was charged with tending to and protecting my brothers. Protection is often "the karma" of the eldest in this life.
Remember when I told you that you were protective toward women. You didn't want to think so. You are protective still. Under certain circumstances it is something you never get away from. I believe I have a rather overdeveloped sense of duty. I was protective of my clients to my own detriment. I am even protect of the dog. He is a pretty big and healthy dog. But the one time I was homeless briefly, I saw to it that he had a home though I didn't.
And my ex? I was protective of him too.
You recounting of the garbage disposal incident moved me. I once lost my temper with my daughter because she broke my VCR. It was my fault really. I had not made it clear enough to her how to put a tape in correctly and she broke it jamming one in backwards. It now occurs to me that I did not sufficiently apologize to her and I feel bad about it.
