Letters to the Editor
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I might be hated for saying it, but perhaps to the biggest degree,
global warming, the imminent end of oil, the oil foraging imperialism in Iraq, etc. are all due to profligate reproduction. There are too many of us. For the sake of the Earth and the other remaining species, are maladies, such as war, famine, global warming, etc., are Earth's remedies.
Our species doesn't need more children. Those who argue that are arguing for every person's prime directive of replicating their genes. THEIR genes.
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It's kind of true...
...Not all working mothers are guilty of this, but I have worked with MANY who always have an excuse for coming in late and leaving early, needing days off, flopping their work on others because they're "so busy," not attending evening or weekend work-related events because of family issues, etc. When you are a single childless woman, many working mommies and men (married or not) assume you don't have a life. The single childless woman often gets roped into doing things because they don't have "outside responsibilities" like the others. That is SO insulting. Single childless women do have other responsibilities...maybe not related to children or husbands, but they have lives outside of work. If people are wondering why single childless women are often seething at work, ask yourself the question: Do they get stuck covering for people with kids? Do they have to attend events that others get to skip because of kids? If you're all at the same company, making (relatively) the same amount of money, is it fair that one person gets to skip out whenever there's a child issue, while the other picks up the slack? It gets VERY old being treated as a second-class citizen when you're a single childless woman. We want respect, just like the working mothers. Perhaps if everyone did their job and didn't let the outside world infringe on it that much, people would calm down about working mothers. But it seems to me that many working mothers -- again, not all, but many -- use any excuse to dodge work for their kids. My mother worked, and she was never late unless one of us was really, really sick. A sniffle isn't an excuse. If you can't handle the work hours as a working mother, perhaps a new job is in order...something from home or with flex hours. It may sound cold, but work is work. It has to be fair for everyone; otherwise resentment sets in. (And the working mothers would be upset, too, if everything got dumped on them by the single childless women...reverse the situation and see how you'd feel.)
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I childfree and I don't mind helping the child-laden
After all, I get to keep all my free time, all my money and all my own sanity. Co-workers with kids get none of these perks, and yet, somebody has to continue the world, some young whippersnappers have to look after me when I'm old, and some young workers will have to foot the bill for my Social Security.
So, within reason, what do I care if my co-worker is 30 minutes late because her kids had a meltdown just as the bus arrived or even if she needs me to check something for her because she had to leave early or risk being reported by the dance studio for child abandonment because no one showed up to get one or more kids after class and Dad, the usual dance pick up parent, is stuck on the road behind a wreck.
Like, uhm, big deal. I'm happy to help her. (Or him. It goes both ways these days.)
They're parenting the next generation. I'm spoiling my pets.
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Having kids is something people do for themselves, not for me
I think it's time we start seeing the child-rearing as they are: people with a hobby. A time-consuming and expensive hobby... like crack. I don't get special leave from work for my hiking trips or bike rides.
Parents would like us to believe we should thank them for doing some great favor, when they know that they have kids because they don't have other things to do. With 6 billion people on the planet, having kids is no favor. I'll happily help out parents - of adopted children.
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I really get tired of all the man-bashing
As a working father with four kids, I really get tired of hearing the same old blah about how men don't have to care about being fathers, don't have any home responsibility, etc. etc. etc., unlike women! Its just ridiculous and near-offensive to imply that fathers don't have to do anything more than "moonlight as Daddy". Yeah, I guess I must have imagined every day of my life for the past nine years. Stereotypes help nobody.
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This is a red herring.
The catfight dynamic makes for an attention-getting headline, but it's not real.
It's not women versus women, or men versus women. It's childless versus parent. Of course men who are parents are going to be more sympathetic towards working mothers.
The hostility is real, sure. It's rooted in the 60+ work hours that have become customary. We need reform that makes everyone's work day more sane, not just parents'. Like a worker bill of rights.
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Correction
Header should read "I am childfree. . ." not "I childfree."
Whoops!
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Outside of the left, childbearing is STILLwidely considered a societal, not a personal choice.
The biggest stigma goes to the childfree, who are seen as "selfish" by a childbearing majority. Most women's magazines and movies stigmatize "childfree" (Devil Wears Prada's Meryl Streep is an archtype of the soulless childfree harsh career woman, etc).
So while the childfree may resent the refusal of parents to give everything over to the unreasonable demands of the corporation, they ignore the fact that corporations steal their free time, attempt to regulate their habits outside of the office, and thrive on worker in-fighting.
Neither is the enemy. Un reasonable schedules and demands, randomn layoff the juice stock, etc are.
Right now, society encourages childbearing with child exemptions, flex daycare, legal support, etc. Having too few children in society is as bad as too many, as France is showing us.
Calling us breeders and ripping on parents marginalizes people on the left. It gives right wingers who call the left "anti-child", "Selfish", and "wanting the extenction of the humans" or "caring more about animals than humans" fodder. To be frank, it is ripping defeat from the jaws of victory. People are beginning to trust moderates and liberal as managers. Too much of this anti-child, and mother craziness makes people go back to the 2004 Republican comment "I don't like Bush, but there's no way I'll vote for those crazy Democrats".
Lord knows, having read all of the anti-mother stuff on Salon, I understand that sentimentg. I'm an independant. Don't make me want to stay home in 2008 from fear that voting from Democrats will remove accomodations for mothers in the workplace.