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• Thursday, September 13, 2007 02:21 PM

  Pressure to have more than one

  We decided to have only one child and that has worked well for us but its amazing how many strangers feel they have the right to give me hell for that. Most bizarre of all is that the most common reason given to me is that my daughter could die. Um, and so then I'd have an emergency back-up kid and everything would be fine? Thanks for that little ray of sunshine, complete stranger.

  My answer to any fundementalists on this issue is that I believe in strictly interpreting the bible and since marriage is between ONE man and ONE woman (according to them) and I am supposed to go forth and multiply its very simple. 1x1=1.

  Another popular argument is that my daughter needs someone to play with. She has lots of friends and if she really wants a baby, she can hopefully decide to have one of her own some day. In the meantime, she will have to do without a permanent playdate because it kind of seems to me that the number of children in the family should be decided by the adults not the 6 year old who may not fully grasp what it means to bring another child into the household. BTW, she has never asked for a brother or sister, but I know some kids do.

  I can't get over the insensitivity of being berated by a stranger for only having one child (or none for that matter). For all they know I may have been unable to have more.

  —mappeal Read mappeal's other letters
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