Letters to the Editor
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it may be getting worse but this has always been the case to a degree, women have always preferred to approach other women for help to avoid being hit on
what adds to the problem is that when men make the obvious and inevitable response to NOT be on the lookout to help other people this is also held against them.
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Media fear saturation, Profits before people.
When walking alone, I've come to expect that women will fear me. I cross to the other side of the street to reduce their fear, but it's impossible to counteract the continual onslaught of sensational media coverage of every assault and murder in a nation of 300 million people. It's no wonder every man is a potential rapist in the minds of many women.
It's undeniable that covering every fearful story is good media business. Should good business be a justification for everything, no matter the result?
I think it's another example of money mania poisoning civil society.
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God forbid that Broadsheet should link to Glenn Sacks who has been pursuing this
Really despicable. You wonder why you are in a ghetto and this is why.
You can't reach out to anyone, can you?
You wonder why women flee the label "feminist" and say that you are just another bunch of haters and bigots.
Here's the Glenn Sacks articles that you are too gutless to post:
http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=857
Oh look, he was on this at least two months before you noticed.
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I gave up
I used to volunteer as an adult advisor to a youth organization, with members from 7th to 12th grade. I worked with a female advisor.
It was a great exerience, and the organization was well served with training and resources for the volunteers. Each year we got risk management training, for example.
But something started to happen in the late 90s. Accusations against adults who work with kids, both professionally and as volunteers, were increasing, and the risk management training began to emphasize practices which eliminated any chance of adult male finding himself alone with a youth. Ideally, an adult male would ALWAYS have an adult female present, even in groups. But never ever ever ever should he allow himself to be alone with only one other youth.
It would be an understatement to say that I started to feel paranoid. If one of the kids approached me in a hallway I'd check to see if we were in sight of others. If not, I'd find others as quickly as possible. I would postpone or cancel meetings if the adult female volunteer couldn't be present.
The women I volunteered with never felt the same degree of anxiety. Most felt the process was unfair, that it put the male volunteers (and professionals) in a position of fearing the kids were ostesibly working to help.
In late 2000, I found myself driving a van ful of kids to an event, with my female co-advisor along. We stopped for a restroom break at a gas station with a food mart, and after using the restroom I went back to the van while the kids got snacks and drinks. One of the girls, a high school sophomore, came back before the others and we chatted for a minute until the others returned. She didn't actually get in the van, just stood beside the open side door.
Later, someone who wasn't even on the trip asked me what I was talking to the girl about when we were alone. I couldn't remember exactly -- it was innocuous "how much longer till we're there?" kind of talk. What I wanted to know was who told this person I'd been "alone" with this girl, and what the concern was. No concern, just wanted to make sure I understood the risks associated with being alone with a girl in my charge like that.
For one minute? In full view of the world outside a food mart? Me in the driver's seat of the van, her standing on the other side of the van chatting through an open door about something no more risky than the weather or the drive?
I quit. I'd had enough. Maybe my paranoia was unreasonable or irrational. All I knew is that the anxiety I felt about the risks associated with my volunteer work began to overwhelm me. I used to enjoy working with the kids, but I came to loathe every event, afraid of what might be misinterpretted or misconstrued. It just wasn't worth it anymore.
That was over five years ago. I've since heard that the organization I used to volunteer for is having a harder and harder time finding adult male volunteers. I wonder why.
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I think we do teach them to fear men
As a home office working Dad I have watched my daughter since her mother went back to work when she was three months old. She is now 6 1/2 and we do everything together. She goes with me everywhere or at least did before she started school and still does after scool even now. I have traveled with her many times on airplanes alone and every time we have been stopped for additional screening and I am asked by TSA where her mother is. My answer is always "None of your business" which goes over as well as you might imagine. Screw them. You would think a father travelling alone with his own daughter was a crime.
I have also been the subject of plenty of sideways glances at malls and stores, etc. When she was an infant it was much worse with people staring like I was a circus freak whenever we went to the grocery store. Also while waiting to pick her up at dance classes where other mothers stare at me constantly like I'm just some guy hanging out for no reason. Believe me I am not being paranoid. Other mothers do not want their kids to come over any play with her either. So I can tell you that the hysteria is real and pretty kooky in my estimation since they are gonna be having relationships of all kinds with men the rest of their lives and whatever anyone else thinks I think my daughter is way ahead of the game having had the relationship she has had and continues to have with me.
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Oh for Pete's Sake
Anonymous at 1:36 p.m. is upset that Broadsheet hasn't linked to Glenn Sacks on this issue and didn't write about this issue two months ago. This is just getting ridiculous. First of all, Broadsheet is a women's issues blog. So it is ridiculous for the men's rights crew to constantly complain on this blog that Broadsheet isn't covering the issues THEY want to see covered. If Broadsheet isn't covering what you think is most important, why do you keep reading it and commenting on it? And why don't you read blogs that are more focused on the issues you care about -- or better yet, start your own.
It's also kind of funny that when Broadsheet covers a men's issue, you have to whine about how Broadsheet didn't present it the way you wanted it or when you wanted it. Methinks anonymous has some control issues. And that a lot of the trolls on this blog really just don't like the idea of feminist women blogging at all.