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• Friday, August 31, 2007 12:02 AM

  Between the Iraq and the hard such-as-place

  Ah, such splendiferous PC fruit. Every answer is right and facts mere patriarchal constructs. All is relative and inbred and Deliverance-worthy. I can't wait to hear Ms. Third Runnerup after her cottage ejimication. I'm sure her valedictory speech will be worthy of Demosthenes. Or whatever.

  Interestingly, folks who laughed their butts off when John Bobbitt had his penis amputated by a jealous vaginate make excuses for this blonde bonehead. Why? We are told she was "nervous and simply blurted out a bunch of nonsense." Then again, maybe she did a brain dump and that was all she wrote.

  I hate being told to tolerate foibles based on gender, politics, or gender politics. Senator Bob Packwood, Republican, got drummed out the Senate for trying to kiss women when drunk. Bill Clinton, Democrat, got lauded for splooging on an intern's dress, facing sundry attempted rape accusations, cheating on his blowhard, bowling-pin legged wife, etc.

  Consistency? Not! It's all about whose al is gored.

  Now comes a pagenteer whose looks, I'm sure, compensate for any "power" feminists say she lacks. People who'd nail any male to the communications cross for flubbing even one word fall over backwards to "understand" this goober. Again, why?

  If we are to forgive, tolerate, etc. all goddess' chillin' chillun, let's at least insist fembots put away the long knives when men are objects of ridicule. Which is early and often.

  " I'll feel sorry for all of the girls who will never have the same opportunities as any of the contestants simply because nature has not gifted them with faces and bodies that are considered beautiful by society's standards."

  Yes. And all the boys, too, who will never have the same opportunities as other males because nature did not gift them with brains, luck, or pluck to get money that societal standards decree women-bedding/mating/marrying men must have.

  Coochie hoochies seek lucre'd lads. And vice versa.

  Then again, maybe all a jamoke will have to say to win our heroine's heart is to say, "I personally have a map. And I believe my South African education, such as it was, will Iraq your iworld. Everywhere, including Likesuchas Land. I believe that over here in the U.S. we should help the South, the Iraq, the Asia, and the of America I Singh. Those countries will then be able to build up our future for our children. And save the whales. And stop AIDS. Amen. And awomen."

  —MerelyMortalMale Read MerelyMortalMale's other letters
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