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Your quibble about the #1 lead in the movie not being female....well frankly, that usually only occurs in movies such as those listed at the beginning of my message, i.e. films intended ONLY for women, that are ONLY about women & their lives, etc etc
EXACTLY!
You've hit the nail on the head!
That is PRECISELY the problem. Male leads are regarded as universally appealing and female leads as appealing to females.
Pixar, with its string of critical and financial successes, is clearly in the position to breach that convention. It would be awesome if they did.