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I was reading a comment the other day about the young woman who was kidnapped and murdered in Kansas last week. A man (I presume) made a comment that she shoudln't have been wearing shorts and a tank top, because it brougth unwanted attention to herself. A lot of people attacked him for the comment, but, surprisingly, a woman backed him up, saying that her 3 daughters weren't allowed to dress that way because they would draw undesired attention.
I think we do this so that we can feel safe. If the victim did something to bring on their attack, then we can simply not do that something and we will not be attacked. It doesn't work, of course, because life is not that simple. People get mugged even when they aren't flashing expensive watches. Women get raped even if they aren't young and beautiful and wearing skimpy clothing, or drunk, or in a bad neighborhood. And spouses get battered even if they are totally innocent of any wrongdoing. But if we pretend that they must be doing something to deserve it, then we know that we must be safe - because we'd never do anything to deserve being beaten.
