Letters to the Editor
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Not looking for a fight...
...I just have a question that I would like to ask the Broadsheet regulars.
Now, I'm no fan of the Submissive Wife stuff, in fact I'm of the opinion that if I have to suffer through the soul deadening work-a-day world of late stage capitalism, then so should you. So this isn't so much about the article as the response. I do wonder if you ladies see any sort of platform in which it is okay for men to criticize women.
Granted often that criticism does come in the form of the troll posters, and they are rightly vilified, but it seems as if...when legitimate questioning of the article is sent in by a man who isn't on the party line...that man is usually shouted down by cries of "Troll" "Misogynist" or "Patriarchy".
So seriously, I'd just like to know...is there a way or a space in which men can disagree or offer a differing viewpoint on a subject, or is it honestly your position that since we pretty much did have the power since the caveman days we are to be silent partners in the building of this new world?
That doesn't exactly strike me as the most equitable of solutions.
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feminists are into sex and accepting of maleness WHEN THEY CAN HAVE EVERYTHING THEIR OWN WAY
everyone would like this but most people don't have a socially approved of ideology to make demanding it sound reasonable. This desire is behind the absurd continuing claim that males and females are the same. If they are(or should be) the same then there is no need to compromise over leigitimate differences.
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Passive Aggressive
I find it strange that the "nagging" wives are being referred to as passive aggressive in this thread. My mother, who in many ways is a "surrendered" wife, is possbily the most passive aggressive person I've ever met. When our oven door broke she asked my father for a new oven, and when he refused, she said, "That's fine" and let the oven door fall off (he bought a new oven when he realized she couldn't bake for him). When he made a wrong turn on our way to the aiport once, she tried to correct him and he said he knew where he was going, so she let him drive 25 miles in the wrong direction, realize his mistake, then get to the airport late. When her brother died and she wanted to go to his funeral (out of country), my father said no, and my mother told him, "It's ok, I have many brothers and sisters and can't go home everytime one of them dies." Then she wrote out Christmas cards to his entire family. Her philosophy seems to be let him be as wrong as he wants to be.
And me? I'm just going to stay out of it all.
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Unlike your boyfriend,can't fool lil ol me, Le
Good think that my bf is nothing like you. I woudln't be with him if he was. And it's not like he doesn't have feelings or emotions or any of that. Of course he does. But having feelings and emotioncs does not equal being a whiny, pathetic asshole.
Of course you equate a man complaining with not being a man. So therefore your man does not complain, he knows what it takes to make you continue to put out and complaining ain't it.
and Of Course you care about his feelings only in so much as your concern for that which is in your sphere. If he cheated on you or merely walked off, you couldn;t care less anymore about his feelings, other than if you had to show residual concern for him on the possibility that you two might get together in the future. This is where the average man and woman differ. AVERAGE ANONYMOUS men will literally fall into the mud for a little old lady they do not know to stay dry and walk over them. There is no equivalent for women (witha rare few exceptions that PROVE the rule). Women only do as much as needed for that which concerns THEM specifically and hits them personally. If it is advantageous to take care of a person, it is only for the reason that it would be disadvantageous to you if you did not.
Believe me, if your boyfriend cheated on you and you found out, his so called feelings and emotions would quickly become whiny complaints from that creep.
In this way, you also prove another maxim, that women have no internal morality. One day he is a hero, but if he scorns you, he is a pathetic worm. Same guy, different day. It is all 'personal' attacks to you women, there is no high ground (with a few rare exceptions which PROVE the rule).
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the term passive aggressive seems to have no clearly defined meaning
the person in physical control of a vehicle, or a bank account, has the final word while that is the case. If they won't listen then not fighting, when you can't do anything anyway, seems reasonable.
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Hypcrities, as usual...
>She's a very smart, driven, independent woman (who is probably a Salon reader herself, or would be if she spent more time online).<
I just love how "smart, independent women" who promote this crap never, ever, ever take their own advice and submit to kinder/kuche. If Doyle (or Katie O'Beirne. Or Sylvia Hewlitt. Or Diane Crittenden) believe a woman's whole life should be being a wifey/moo, why don't _they_ live it?
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Sheesh...
>Men expect (and they should!) the home to be a haven.<
And shouldn't women expect that as well? Or does that work only one way?
>Look, women can do whatever they want - stay at home, go earn the big bucks, whatever... But if they expect to be married (and have a HAPPY marriage) all of that has to be turned OFF once hubby walks through the door. Otherwise a man could just very easily outsource all of the *wifely* duties - home cook, cleaning lady, call girl for sex without the stress, etc.<
Guys like you don't want a wife. You want a mother.
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Men who love robots
Shazzer said: Look, women can do whatever they want - stay at home, go earn the big bucks, whatever... But if they expect to be married (and have a HAPPY marriage) all of that has to be turned OFF once hubby walks through the door. Otherwise a man could just very easily outsource all of the *wifely* duties - home cook, cleaning lady, call girl for sex without the stress, etc.
And women's incentive to stay in a marriage with a guy who doesn't care about them as a person, only as a collection of duties to be performed for him, is what again?
Deering said:
Guys like you don't want a wife. You want a mother.
No, he doesn't -- mothers don't create a perfect stress-free haven for their children where they never, ever expect the kids to do anything around the home or take out their own frustrations on the kids.
What he wants is to be a Victorian gentleman, with servants. Only he wants there to be only one. And he thinks it's fine if she also has a job; it's just that at home, she's his servant.
Good luck with that, dude. If you advertise in the BDSM community, you *might* find a woman who will put up with your bullshit. Most of us would rather be single than living with a guy who can't be bothered to be a friend, let alone a co-equal in creating a home.
And I can't believe that people like Brightstar are seriously arguing that in a marriage *women* walk all over men, when there are men out there like Shazzer who apparently believe that women are walking all over men if women are not perfect, cheerful, selfless robots who never complain, have feelings or frustrations, and *certainly* never express these feelings to the person who supposedly loves them.