That kiva.org site sure is nifty.

I've enjoyed it today and am now invested in everything from pigs to peanut butter.

If you don't want to cook, just order a meal pre-made. Or just don't cook. When your family incredulously asks you where the food is, tell them you are acting just the way they do. so if they want food, or christmas-decorated house, or a clean house, they'll have to pitch in as much as you do. seems only fair.

Many women just feel that they can do it better than anyone else and don't trust men to do things like cook or clean or decorate or buy presents.

Some men and some children in families where the wife-mother does all the housework, like Homer "does Maggie sleep in the microwave? how many cigars does Bart get?" Simpson, will intentionally screw things up, so that you just stop asking them to do anything. Don't give in to that. Keep asking them, and don't fix their mess for them.

I've seen plenty of women who just don't "trust" their husbands to do the shopping. So they don't allow them to do anything! They don't trust them to do the holiday cards and plenty of men seem to be fine with being shoved to the back so they can just sit on the couch so that they don't have to get disapproving looks from the wife about a gift they bought. Plenty of people say men are control freaks, but plenty of women have their own market cornered. My mom would do this to my dad, if he made a mistake or didn't do something the exact same way my mom did it then she would just berate him so he'd never help again. After he left, she did it to me. So controlling, if I didn't hang her shirts just so and didn't fold her panties a certain way she'd ream me out, until one day I got old enough and just told her if you don't like the way I do your laundry then do it yourself! She stopped complaining after that.

I love to go shopping during Christmas, looking and searching for something that I know the person will treasure, the lights the decorations and seeing someone be happy with what they received is really nice. I also give to charity too!

And yes, if you are doing your boyfriends/husbands shopping too, then you're just a sucker. Possibly just one of those people who can't say no and is too timid to stand up for themselves. Are there just women who believe because of their sex that it's there duty to be a freaking servant all the time? I would never ever do my husbands shopping for him and when I have children I certainly would not choose and purchase the gift they are getting me. Great way to teach them decision making skills! If the children are too young to make something or go shopping on their own or with some relative, then you should just go without until they are.

Besides can you really treasure a gift from your child when your child didn't have anything to do with it? It's like those stories I hear about when wives take their hubbys credit card and just buy their own gift because he's such a crappy gift giver.

that is the best gift idea ever!

...my suggestion to anyone getting "caught up" in the commerciality of the Christmas season, and wondering if it's all worth it: Get in touch with your inner Linus and remember that everything else is just so much temporary tinsel. Works for me every year!

Our church sponsors an Alternative Gift Market where you can choose from donating to a charity in a loved one's name or buying a gift made by a charitable organization. I do that for my family. I tell my husband to buy for his family. My immediate family hates decorating so I finally just got a small pre-lit tree and my son and I did it in less than half an hour. The most shopping I have done has been at the dollar store for the kids I work with. This has been the least stressful buying season ever.

Now if someone can just get rid of those damned Aflac christmas commercials.

It seems like too often, people are just buying for the sake of buying -- for the sake of having X number of gifts under the tree. I told my son this year to decide what he really, REALLY just can't live without and I would get it for him. Shockingly enough, he says he really can't think of anything. Awesome, apparently I've been doing something right. If I see something I know someone will really love, I get so excited to get it for them, but I don't see the point in buying mindless crap, so I just don't do it. I love being out among the shoppers, with the christmas lights, and people bustling to and fro. But if I didn't love it, I wouldn't do it.

This article just seems silly. It's not really about women and shopping. It's about women allowing themselves to be taken advantage of. A single mother out shopping for the gifts from her boyfriend to HIS kids? Um, f**k that. I would tell him to shake his own happy ass down to the mall. Which is probably why I didn't wind up with a loser like that for a husband. Buying gifts for your KIDS to give YOU? Seriously, what is the point of such a mindless exercise? These women aren't forced to do this, if there's stress involved, it's their own fault for allowing themselves to be taken advantage of this way.

Everyone would be a lot better off if they could just stop and say "HELL NO, I'M NOT DOING THAT."

I don't know when it became fashionable to post hateful letters to Broadsheet, critizing every nuance. If you don't like Broadsheet, why the hell are you reading it? 'Tis the season, perhaps.

As for the article: For many women this is a time of a load of shit work! Studies, statistics and anecdotal evidence has confirmed for years that women do the lion's share of household duties. Christmas (or other gift-giving exchanges)just add an extended chore list for many women who are already pressed for time, myself included. This is not to say I don't like the holidays or that my partner does nothing, but there IS a societal expectation that women will just do it all because they innately or genetically just "know" the best way to do it and it is "women's work." That is such a load of crap!

And this is on top of the fact that our society has turned Christmas into an operatic, epic event of ever-increasingly crazed proportions. When did my love become equated with the "perfect gift," whatever the hell that is? Love can't be measured in money or material possessions. But we've put ourselves in this guilt-vortex where everyone we know gets a gift and a card and party and on and on. Then we have to one-up each other. It's stupid and it's not the true meaning of generosity!

It's true that charitable giving can be an important part of the holiday for some, but give me a break. For the vast millions of Americans who are gorging themselves on gluttonous consumer-spending, this is an orgy of goods and pleasure -- not giving unto the needy.

This year I made up my mind to vote with my dollars and make my gifts do double-duty. Most of the gifts I purchased for others contribute some part of their proceeds to charity and many of them support small, locally owned businesses and cooperatives.

For ideas on such "marxist" ideas (I don't know when social conscience became equated with socialism) visit igive.com, a charity mall site or justgive.org. And there are hundreds of great charities out there selling gifts this season that can look great under the tree and do your heart and soul some good as well.