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You are using vegetarian and vegan interchangeably, and I, for one, don't react the same way to both terms. Vegan seems to connote a militant vegetarianism, advocacy for the animal rights thing, and support of PETA and similar organizations. I react negatively to that. Being a "vegetarian" does not carry the same meaning, and my reaction is not negative.
I don't know what a "soft vegan" is, but it seems like an attempt to call yourself a vegan without exactly calling yourself a vegan. Just call yourself a vegetarian and let it go at that.