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I just wanted to tell Anonymous that she can always change back. I don't know what state she lives in, but it probably costs about $200 and can be done at the local courthouse. You might be able to get publication waived if you ask, since you'd only be changing back to a recently used former name. Then just send out announcements to everyone and there you are.
Here's an idea I've seen people use, put his surname as a middle or second middle name, for example: Jane Hislast Yourlast. He can do the same if he, and that would probably be included for free in your own name change petition