"I want kids, but not marriage.....I too relish my freedom. I like having Sundays all to myself to read, nap, and do crossword puzzles. I like dating several men at once or just taking a break from my social life all together and taking myself on dates to art museums, nice restaurants, alone."

Then DON'T HAVE KIDS. Because if you do, you will lose all of that unless you can afford to have live-in help that takes care of the kids.

"That's such an old fashioned notion: to stand by your man no matter what."

Just because something is old doesn't mean it's bad. What does a commitment mean if someone can just walk away because it's not exactly what they want 100% of the time?

"Watch Harold and Maude if you haven't already; that woman knows how to live! :-D"

And how to die.

But Maude was not in a commitment situation with anyone - at least not anyone living at the time depicted in the film. She'd had her life, not always on her own terms, and passed on what wisdom she could to Harold. It's clear that, in the past, she'd had commitments and had honored them.

Harold, OTOH, was just beginning his life and didn't have anything to commit himself to. Maude gave him the desire to look for something.

A great film, but doesn't really fit LW's situation.

The problem isn't that LW got married young, nor that hubby travels.

The problem is that she's bought into the romance industry's fantasy idea that a good marriage is fun, joy, sex and companionship all the time, and that if yours isn't, it's time to dump the spouse and move on.

The reality of most marriages is that after you've been together a while the old ball-and-chain's rough edges start to stick out, and the other side of the fence starts to look really green. That's when the real work of being married *begins*.

What keeps the fantasy idea alive is that every once in a while two people who are naturally and automatically compatible find each other, get married and have a great life together. They're the exception that proves the rule, and usually their secret is an ability to forget the bad parts fast but remember and treasure the good parts forever.

LW says the hubby is a nice guy, hardworking, with a good job "and all that stuff." So it's not like he's abusive or irresponsible. Sure he's a jerk sometimes but so is almost everybody else, including LW. And while he travels a lot, is that because he wants to or because the job requires it?

The problem is that LW thought the initial infatuation of "being in love" was a natural permanent state - which it isn't, at least not for most people. As another poster so rightly stated, love is an action. What has LW done to make the marriage work?

The Big Problem is that unless LW figures all this out, she's probably going to divorce the guy, move on, find another man, and then repeat the whole thing all over again.

Counseling is a good idea. Therapy is a good idea. Getting divorced from a nice hardworking guy with a good job "and all that stuff" just because he doesn't light LW's fire the way he used to is not a good idea.

but I am inspired by them.

If the cyclists can do 150 hilly miles in the rain, maybe I can do 15 miles on a nice day.

Maybe I can push a little harder running up the next hill, add a little more distance to the next workout, use the steps instead of the elevator, go out in the bad weather rather than taking an off day.

Sure it's trivial next to what Olympians do, but it's in the same spirit: do the best you can.