I'm somehow reminded of a feature in a "woman's magazine" in the '50's - "Can This Marriage Be Saved?"... each side prosyltized their woes, and then the counselor negoatiated a basis of communicaction. The tricker was the follow-up, a few months down the road to see what stuck, and what just became more unglued. We have that here, given that LW and the Evil Husband have both posted, and both have stylized positions of some legitimate angst with life in general, with the marriage, and with each other. (Of course, the marriage is not a third entity sitting at the table, the marriage is the nature of the contract between these two for how they choose to share a life).

And it sounds as if these two don't actually talk, they just project their hopes and dreams for wedded bliss, and then expect it to happen. It is in living in the projections of their respective visions for the marriage that the collapse of trust has occurred, and it appears that, perhaps, the kitty of trust of affection and communication was rather low to begin with. That said, if LW and the Evil husband wish to try communicating with each other, they may find that they can reconstruct their marriage in a way that has meaning to each/both of them or, they may find, in the immutable words of Gertrude Stein that there is not much "there there...." and move on, without recrimination. Marriage is not an immutable state; the marriage contract gets renegotiated countless times as each individual grows (or not). they have some hassles, including radically different cultural definitions of what a marriage should be, some radically different perceptions as to whose priorities should be paramount at the moment...and what to do about living in London!

I do note that LW notes in one of her postings that the situation became horrific and violent and she moved out; I would note that if the Evil Husband has a propensity for domestic violence, that is a dealbreaker that subsumes all other forms of immaturity, lack of communication and lack of trust.... if the EH is given to conflict resolution via hitting and striking, then the deal is done, and it is time for LW to lick her wounds, get her graduate degree and grow up solo sans the projected "romance" of her current circumstance.

For whatever it's worth, I question the concept of mediocraty as a reason for not pursuing an area of deep interest. LW may not possess the talent to write the Great American Novel, but there are innumerable ways of using the skills of writing to be of interest, make a living and make a social contribution. There is a great deal of turf between being a brillliant best-seller with a constant crush of booksigning parties and movie openings (after the rights have been sold) and doing "nothing". LW may wish to re-examine her interest in words, in writing, and explore meaningful ways of using her skills to maximum benefit.