Ladies and gentlemen, the Mayor of San Francisco.

First the affair, and the grotesque betrayal at the center of it, and now this. In 1991, after her electrifying speech at the Democratic National Convention, a lot of reporters were talking up Ann Richards as the next big thing in the Democratic Party, possibly even a future candidate for the Presidency. But Texas politicos (and others) would sadly shake their heads "No." When asked why, they'd make the hoisting-a-drink gesture and raise an eyebrow. Newsom now has the same stigma, and in our Twelve Step-besotted culture it won't go away.

It has always burned my ass that Bush got a free pass on his drinking but Richards always wore the scarlet letter "A" for alcoholic. But then that's largely because Richards had to run off to AA meetings every other day (no matter where she was or what she was doing) to stay off the hooch, whereas Bush at least appeared to have cured himself through will-power. Yet another example of how AA has contributed to the descent of our culture and society.

Do tell.

But to be fair, this is 2007. In order to be anyone worth listening to you have claim to go to rehab for something. I don't think I'll even bother voting for anyone who isn't a drunk, drug soaked, wife beating, pissing in public, racist homophobe with Christian values while s/he's licking crank off a hooker's cock. Throw in antisemitism and running around with your vagina hanging out in public, for bonus points. At least then, like Marion Barry, you know EXACTLY what you're getting.

Our mayor, in all his dwindling glory. From his proposed sweetheart deal with Earthlink as he hands over our city's wireless services, to ignoring the middle-class flight from San Francisco, the city's demographic barely recognizable from what it was just ten short years ago. But I'm getting off track here, just know that the Wall Street analogy is apt, although let's call him Gordon Gecko for better measure.

How much Newsom looks like Tim Roth. How tall is he? He looks short here, but in still photos you get the impression he clears six feet.

Not that it matters.

Wallstreet is a great film, and I've seen it multiple times. So, it's really bothering me that you described this clip as "Newsom channels Charlie Sheen's Bud Fox." What scene in Wallstreet are you talking about? I don't remember Bud Fox ever saying anything like this.